Firm shake

Avoid these 8 styles of handshakes

Dead Fish, Hand Crusher, Long Lingerer, Hip Hipster — do any of these describe your handshake style?

Dead Fish. Hand Crusher. Long Lingerer. Do any of the above describe your personal style of shaking hands?

According to at least one communications expert, they’re among the eight handshake methods to avoid, including Hip Hipster (think fist bumps, etc.), Brush Off rushed exchanges, Wet Weasel (carry a hankie to wipe off nervousness), Hand Hugger (someone who covers your hand with both of theirs) and Shugger, a shaker who pulls you close as if to hug you.

My friends and associates on Facebook and LinkedIn have suffered through all of them.

Said Midwest City High School classmate Wanda Davis, of Sulphur, “I’m a lady. I don’t need a man crushing my arthritic hands!”

Meanwhile, fellow classmate Robin Smith, of Newton, Arkansas, said when she was working that she paid close attention to a job applicant’s handshake.

“A dry, firm handshake started off the interview on a positive note. I couldn’t stand the limp handshakes,” Smith said.

Public relations pro Debbie Anglin, of Oklahoma City, admits she’s guilty of hand hugging, “but only when I haven’t seen someone in a long time.”

Fellow Oklahoma State University alumna Jane Sharrock calls dead-fish handshakes “creepy. They throw me off-balance every time.”

Church friend David Ranek, sorority sister Lisa Parker, and manufacturing executive David Younge all have experienced unique twists on the handshakes to avoid.

Ranek said a selfcentered attorney once twisted his hand to break a shake immediately. Parker said she’s fielded “shake fakeouts,” where someone reaches out and makes some gesture rather than shaking her hand. And, manufacturer David Younge admits he’s often missed connections on the various aforementioned styles, and failed to restart handshakes.

The perfect shake

“Your handshake is like your business card,” said Stacey Hanke, author of “Influence Redefined: Be the Leader You Were Meant to Be.”

“It conveys your confidence, credibility and influence without sharing a single word,” she said.

Hanke recommends practicing the perfect handshake with people you trust. “You want to be so confident in your handshake style that it’s second nature,” she said. “The more comfortable you become, the more confidence you’ll convey.”

Based on body language, most hiring managers know within five minutes if a candidate is a good fit for a job, according to research and experts I quoted in a past article.

Meanwhile, keynoters at an Oklahoma City University’s Meinders School of Business leadership conference said women who seek to be successful absolutely must master the prefect handshake.

Atlanta-based body language expert Patti Wood said first impressions on credibility, likability, attraction and power are made within the first second of meeting someone, and take up to six months of faceto-face interaction to change.

Because women want to be perceived as equals, they always should extend their hands for handshakes, Wood said.

When someone approaches, people should raise their eyebrows to show an openness, which causes approachers to be open, Wood said. “Then scoop in, with your hand tilted down, so you get a palm-to-palm firm grip, versus someone grabbing the end of your fingers in a wimpy handshake,” she said.

Business etiquette expert Carey Sue Vega, of Expeditions in Etiquette, said handshakes should meet the other person’s hand at the webbing of the thumb.

“If you’re physically able, always stand to shake hands, or at least attempt to stand,” Vega said. “If you’re behind your desk, do your best to come out from behind the desk, so nothing is in between you and the person you are meeting,” she said.

One Vega tip I’ll always remember is to stick your name tag just below your right shoulder, because we shake with our right hands so our names will be in the line of vision of the people we’re meeting.

Here’s some other tips from Hanke:

• Anticipate the handshake. Ensure your hand is free, out of your pocket and not holding onto any items. Switching hands to shake is distracting and awkward.

• Make intentional eye contact. Use a kind greeting such as “Nice to meet you” or “Great to see you again.” Incorporate their name with your greeting to help solidify your introduction.

• Remain firm throughout the handshake. Maintain the grip for two seconds before releasing.

• Shake from your elbow, not your wrist. Two or three pumps will do. Any more and your partner will begin to feel uncomfortable.