Finding care amid the losses we never expected
What do I do now that I have experienced an unexpected turn in my life?
A spinal cord injury has left me with huge challenges to my physical abilities. It was a change I didn’t see coming, wasn’t prepared for, and has left me feeling helpless.
As I write those words, I am instantly aware of the many men and women who’ve come into my office over the years. Men and women whose lives in different ways were also changed forever — a change they didn’t see coming, were not prepared for, and left them feeling helpless.
I hope I simply listened to understand and never offered quick fixes, just listened to how their lives were forever changed and what they were going to miss, and what they were feeling.
I hope I never tried to rush them through their time of grieving and that I offered a safe place for their grief to be expressed, for as long as that took.
I hope I helped them understand there are some losses we never get over; we just learn to live with them.
I hope I helped them understand the importance of a support group of folks who will walk with you through your time of loss.
I hope I offered a safe place to express all the feelings that whirl around inside.
I hope I helped them understand the feelings were normal and didn’t mean anything other than whatever the loss was, it mattered.
In the months ahead, I hope I will be able to give those things to myself.