The Oklahoman

Mixed signals abound after long separation

- Jeanne Phillips

Dear Abby: I have been talking to my ex-boyfriend of more than 22 years. We have a grown son. We are now in our 50s and talking and texting again. I still love him, and I want a relationsh­ip with him, but I’m not sure he wants me back. I don’t know if he’s interested in me or just being friendly.

Can you help? At the end of our last phone call he said, “It’s been a long time. Twenty-two years. We are both different people now. I don’t know if it could be like it was then,” and we said goodnight.

Should I wait for him to text me back? I don’t even know if he’s dating someone. He didn’t say. Please help.

– Second Chance in the East

Dear Second Chance: Continue talking to your ex and let this scenario play out further. Is he initiating these calls and texts, or are you? If it’s him, that’s a hopeful sign. Yes, it is true you are both different people now – but that can be a plus. With the passage of time, you both may have mellowed and matured. If the discussion­s continue, you will find out soon enough if he’s involved with someone or interested in getting back together. And remember, if he’s just being “friendly,” the son you share is a good reason for keeping that friendship going.

Dear Abby: My wife is very protective of our dog, “Spencer.” I agree with her that Spencer should not receive table food. Yesterday, my wife put a large pile of dog vomit on my desk. She said it “proves” I have been feeding Spencer. Her accusation is not true.

I may have done some peculiar things in my time, but I have never put vomit on someone’s desk. How should I respond?

– Flabbergas­ted in Iowa

Dear Flabbergas­ted: There can be various reasons for a dog having an upset stomach besides having consumed table scraps. Spencer should be checked by a veterinari­an to be sure there isn’t something else going on. As to your wife putting vomit on your desk, well, since you asked – I wouldn’t blame you if you made it plain that SHE is in the doghouse.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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