For Mother’s Day and Father’s Day, parents should give gift of forgiveness
Mother’s Day and Father’s Day are two of those holidays we celebrate that end in angst for a lot of folks. None of us who are parents did it perfectly, and we’re all too aware of how much we’d like to do it over, but just as there are no learning requirements for how to be married, neither is it ever suggested we take parenting classes before preparing to have children.
We loved our children, but there were also those moments when we resented their demands on our time and our sleep, times when we grew weary of the sibling arguments, weary of the messy rooms, weary of their loud music, weary of their sassiness! And horror of horrors, some yelled, and some hit, and looking back, we are ashamed we could have acted that way.
Most of us muddled through parenting — mostly on autopilot. I am sure many of you join me in amazement that any of our children made it to adulthood with some degree of success. And for those who had troubled kids along the way, you are definitely not in the minority. It’s called life. Sometimes life turns out well and sometimes it doesn’t — much of it over which we have little control.
During those weeks following Mother’s Day, with Father’s Day just ahead, I invite moms and dads everywhere to join me in giving ourselves a gift — the gift of forgiveness, understanding we did the best we knew how at the time. If we’d known how to do it better, we would have — as would have our mothers and father before us.
Charlotte Lankard is a licensed marriage and family therapist in private practice. Contact her at clankard@cox.net .