Danger can lurk in Oneida Lake

This is the last entry from the log of Captain John Ready’s cruiser, “Rescue Me.” Captain’s Log, Star Date 7-9-12, 12:05 pm: “I am aboard the vessel appropriately named “Rescue Me” just off the shore of Oneida Lake. The winds are strong, as is the will of the crew.”

12:11 pm: First-mate: “Captain John, I believe we have struck an iceberg.”

Captain: “Check that seaman. I’ll have a look-see. We are in shallow waters; depthfinder reports 12 feet. I’ll stay with the boat. Send the girl overboard to investigate.” 12:12 pm: Girl: “Why Me?” 12:13 pm: First-mate: “Sir, I believe we are balancing on something. I see no water in the vessel. It appears we are fine. Though, our food supplies are low, as we are out of peanuts.”

Don’t Rock the Boat by the Hues Corporation is playing on the stereo.

12:14 pm: Small canoe passes by, sounds of chuckling can be heard from a distance.

12:15 pm: First-mate: “Excuse me…Sir, (to the canoe captain) permission to board?” Canoe Operator: “No.” 12:16 pm: Girl: “Captain, there is a small pool forming in the bow. A bag of Jax is submerged.” Captain John: “I’ll take those.” 12:17 pm: First-mate: “Captain, I think I have a fish on line. Are we going to be stuck long?”

Captain John: “I’m working on it.”12:18 pm: Girl: “Captain, I don’t mean to be a pain, but my feet are getting wet.”

Captain John: “Suck it up buttercup. I’ll hit the bilge pump.”

12:20 pm: “Rescue Me” apparently has rested on an unknown, underwater object, balancing perfectly on the hull. My crew seems to be planning a mutiny. My crew is safe. I am safe. Maybe I should abort this whole “Captain goes down with the boat” concept and let them fend for themselves. No, wait, I can’t do that. They’ll never go with me again. Stick it out just a few more moments. Just a few more.

12:21 pm: Captain John: “First-mate Leo, what are you taking pictures of?” First mate: “Your insurance claim, sir.” 12:22 pm: Arrival of passerby in small row boat. 12:23 pm: “You guys need a tow?” Captain John: “Mayday! Mayday!” First-mate and Girl to Captain: “Captain, wait for us!” 12:25 pm: Authorities arrive. “Hop in folks; we’ll take you to safety. You must be stuck on something big. Our boat can’t even tow it.”

12:30 pm: Captain (after two hours): “I’ll have the beef on a wreck, please.”

All kidding aside, fortunately, we were all OK, and everything was fine. Apparently we hit a tree or large log underwater and it ruptured the boat, causing it to eventually sink several hours later.

In the wake of the terrible tragedy that happened just days before, our adventure got a lot of media attention. I am only poking fun at ourselves here and we feel horrible for the family that experienced the terrible accident. The water can be very dangerous, and there is a lot of debris underneath that you cannot see. Although we were fine, the talk was mostly about how badly it could have ended if we were going fast.

It is scary to see a boat fill up with water, whether you are in a foot of water or 12 feet. Thanks to everyone for checking in on us and making sure we were OK.