I committed domestic violence, now I’m in prison

Can we ever “stop” domestic violence?

Answer: probably not but every voice and hand helps better understand it!

Domestic violence is serious and real. I hope to help lend a voice that’ll change a person’s view. I committed an act of domestic violence that changed my life forever. Don’t ever say “not me,” I said just that. I wasn’t raised around such cowardice nor was it a part of my life until I committed an act of pure selfishness that awarded me with a prison sentence of 2 ½ to 5 years.

I want to help anyone who’ll listen. If you find yourself in a relationship that is toxic or unhappy, don’t stay, get out before you find yourself being a victim or being a perpetrator. If you find that expressing your feelings to your partner and you get the cold shoulder or one word responses it’s probably because the other person is not satisfied by you.

Control was my problem, if your other half has a tendency in needing to be in control it’s not healthy. If you find the other lying or cheating many times by confronting the other will bring about anger or outbursts, don’t try to push further because violence is the next step. Don’t let the other half walk on you, seek help (counseling, a friend you trust or a family member). For me I wanted to always be right and when she confronted me I lashed out, because I couldn’t face being wrong or apologizing. Don’t wait till it’s too late. I failed, don’t you.

I’m 37 years old and never would have thought this, if you don’t listen to your feelings it will interfere with how you handle situations in life.

I love my wife but I allowed jealousy to dictate my actions. Please talk to each other openly, discuss your feelings and don’t let emotions control how you react to each other. Don’t destroy life, build it and guide one another. I hurt every day and I know she hurts, too.

Domestic violence is real, don’t be silent, speak out against domestic violence.

A lifelong Oneida resident, I’m currently incarcerated in state prison. — Lawrence Bartlett, Groveland

Correctional Facility