ADVICE Even though everything seems like it is going great, depression can still happen

DEARANNIE » I want people to know that depression can happen to someone even if her life appears wonderful. I know from experience. A few years ago, I had just married a wonderful man and moved to a beautiful home in a fun new city. I had been looking forward to these changes for months. However, once we moved, I found myself deeply sad and irritable.

I remember when our wedding pictures came in the mail from our photographer. I felt as if I were looking at a stranger when I saw myself. The happy bride in the photos seemed a million miles away. I wondered what was wrong with me. How could I have been so happy just a few weeks before? I was absolutely positive that I would never smile again the way I smiled in those photos. On top of that, I felt so embarrassed and ashamed to be so unhappy. After all, a large group of my friends and family just celebrated with us, brought gifts and wished us well.

I forced myself to join a social group in my new city and saw my primary care physician for a referral to a mental health professional. She diagnosed me with depression and explained that a major life change can sometimes contribute to depression, even if that life change is something great. I got treatment and have felt much better. I want other people to know that they don’t have to suffer with depression. There is help available.

DEAR CHRIS » Thanks so much for coming forward and reminding all of us that depression is common and treatable. Today, Oct. 6, is National Depression Screening Day. About 10 percent of Americans suffer from depression each year. Symptoms to look out for include feelings of hopelessness and pessimism, decreased energy, insomnia or oversleeping, and significant changes in weight. If you feel you or a loved one may be depressed, see a licensed therapist.

Anyone can take a free and anonymous depression screening at http://www.HelpYourselfHelpOthers.org.

DEARANNIE » In response to “Sick and Tired,” the gentleman who is 5 feet tall and having a tough time: My husband and his brother were both short. The difference in the two was that my husband carried himself tall while his brother used his height to gain pity.

My husband not only handled everyday life well but also stood up for those who could not stand up for themselves. Once, when a gang of teens surrounded a man in a wheelchair, terrorizing him, my husband, who was using a cane at the time to get around, waded into the fray, giving the man a chance to get into a nearby store.

The store manager, a woman, came out to help, while all the “tall” men hid like children in safety.

It is not your height that makes you tall. It’s how you feel about yourself.

DEARANNIE » This is about the person who wrote about a social group that has potlucks where one member always takes more than his share, getting in line first, loading his plate, gobbling up his food and then getting in line again. Then he makes sure he’s at the end of the line after everyone else is done, getting another plate so he can finish up what’s left. ( I assume he’s the only one who gets seconds and thirds.) The folks have asked him nicely on several occasions to not go back for more until everyone has had a chance to get a plate, but he doesn’t listen.

I would tell the rest of the group to give him one more chance. Then I would tell him that if he continues his rude behavior, he will be excluded from the group. Unless he has a lot of other redeeming qualities that make him socially desirable, I can’t think of why they would put up with his rude and gluttonous behavior.

That’s just my take. I am a senior citizen, and I may not be so tolerant of rude behavior as younger people.

DEARANNIE » Christmas used to be a time that I enjoyed. I have always enjoyed spending time with siblings and cousins who live in other cities and catching up with them. Over the years, our families have grown. Our older children have grown, and they have children of their own. Some of the younger kids have significant others who always join in with the family celebrations.

My family’s gift- giving tradition is that we have a Kriss Kringle type of exchange for the adults and we all buy gifts for the children. In my case, I need to buy gifts for nearly 20 children/ spouses/ significant others. I am on a limited budget and honestly cannot afford to buy gifts for everyone, yet I still do because I am reluctant to say anything about it. After all, Christmas only happens once a year, and I don’t want to appear to be a Scrooge.

Summer is barely over, and I am already dreading December. I would love to get through a holiday season without getting into a lot of debt. Any ideas would be much appreciated. Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@ creators. com. To find out more about Annie Lane and read features by other Creators Syndicate columnists and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www. creators. com.