Created to connect
September is national Suicide Prevention Month. This year’s theme is “Connect to Protect: Support is Within Reach.” Hopefully you have seen flyers and e-mails in your work-space that help offer support whether you are struggling with thoughts of selfharm, or are wanting to support someone who is struggling with suicidal ideation.
I want to offer an analogy I learned in a Spiritual Resilience class about this idea of connecting. Imagine that someone who is struggling with an issue, whether suicidal ideation or depression, or substance abuse, etc. is a person in the middle of a rapidly flowing stream (their circumstances that put them at risk). They are in a life ring with a rope or ropes to the bank on either side. But they are at risk. The current is strong and wants to sweep them away, and the water is really cold and if they stay there too long, they won’t be able to hang on.
Each of those ropes is a connection, a relationship to someone in their lives. So not all ropes are the same size or strength: kite string, fishing line, inexpensive cotton rope, etc. all the way up to some worn “550” parachute cord. The different relationships are able to bear more weight than others, and some have been cut, by the person on shore or the person in the stream.
Some of the relationships go way back, a coach, classmate, or teacher that was an influence, a grandparent or extended family member that they haven’t seen in a while. Some of the relationships that the individual thought would hold weight didn’t – insincere people who were only there when there was something in it for them, social media “friends”, family members with “issues,” an “ex” after a messy relationship ending, etc. Other relationships are able to handle some weight, such as immediate family, co-workers and supervisors, a faith leader or buddies.
What is important is to find out who else has a connection to your person at risk. Work together to get them out of the middle of the stream rather than playing tug of war. The best way to do that is to listen to the person at risk. Ask them about their story, who they talk to regularly, what they like to do to “let off steam” or if there’s someone from their past that means a lot to them and if you can reach out to that person. Sometimes someone is closer to a recreation league sports team than their family. We are all different.
The more people you have working together, the load is considerably lighter and “teamwork makes the dream work” to get your person at risk to safety.
If you are struggling with thoughts of self-harm or suicide, please reach out and connect! Sometimes you have gotten so tired swimming against the current, you can’t make it to shore all by yourself. Hopefully I’ve given you some ideas about some people you can connect with already. I’m offering to be there as well. My cell-phone number is (928)9209771. If for some reason you can’t reach me, the national suicide prevention lifeline is 1-800-2738255 (TALK) or you can text them, 838255.
Your life matters. You were created for connections. Let’s be there for one another!