Trans-gender athletes, grandchildren, and the ubiquitous Florida joke

Off and on over the years, I've frightened my editors with a column full of thoughts and observations that I never get to write in real stories. This time they actually asked for it... literally.

All of the thoughts and comments in "Stray Thoughts" are not necessarily those of the management and staff of The Pilot News.

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Now that the lawyers are happy and you see the weighty level of what is about to transpire, enter at your own peril.

• I think Governor Holcomb took a lot of unwarranted heat recently regarding his veto of the bill banning trans-gender participation in sports. He pointed to the fact that the IHSAA already had an adequate policy in place.

While I've had my share of disagreements over the years with the IHSAA I agree that when such instances arise they should be dealt with individually on a case-by-case basis.

I'm going to stick my neck out a LONG way on this I know but I think that here in the state of Indiana we are not in danger of a vast horde of men who have transitioned to being women are going to arise with their evil agenda of completely taking over women's high school athletics in the state.

By the same token — sticking my neck out a long way on this one too — I believe we are also safe for the time being from vast hordes of women who have transitioned to being men arising to take over all the CEO positions.

You see what I did there? Right?

• I apologize, I would have written this column a week ago except the roads in this county are so bad that my car literally disintegrated underneath me while driving them. Now I don't have a job. Or electricity. Or healthcare. And my kids all flunked out of school because of lack of an internet signal, but by god, that pavement is smooth as a baby's behind.

• An Indian couple has sued their son and daughter-in-law because they haven't "provided" a grandchild.

“The main issue is that at this age we need a grandchild, but these people (my son and daughter-in-law) have an attitude that they don’t think about us,” said the father. "We want a grandson or a granddaughter within a year or compensation because I have spent my life’s earnings on my son’s education.”

Maybe somebody ought to start them a Gofundme? I know some grandparents right now that would be more than willing to donate their grandchildren.

• Supposedly scientists have grown food in dirt brought back from the moon.

Why didn't they just ask the aliens living there if you could do that? Just another waste of our tax dollars.

• A 19-year-old South Florida woman fled from law enforcement in the Florida Keys and told the deputy who caught up to her that getting arrested was on her “bucket list.”

That's what I love about today's kids. They set that bar so dang high. Live your dreams I always say.

• And finally, A passenger with no flying experience radioed an urgent plea for help when the pilot of a small plane suddenly fell ill off Florida’s Atlantic coast — notice Florida again — and was able to land the plane safely with the help of air traffic controllers.

Woo-hoo. Big deal. Play the school song. That happened at least a dozen times in those "Airport" movies in the '70's.

Based on that Leslie Nielson should win the Nobel Prize.

That's it. Move along. Nothing to see here.