The Reporter (Lansdale, PA)

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helping cook meals for children with learning disabiliti­es or doing odd jobs like fixing the windows that wouldn’t work property throughout Morgandale as residents moved in.

“There was something with the latch that would break, and he figured out how to fix it, so he would just make the rounds around the neighborho­od and go fix everybody’s windows,” said Alexis.

“I liked doing that kind of work,” he added.

Now, the couple and their family are looking for help from their community. Helen is bedridden and requires total care 24 hours a day, while Alex needs supervisio­n but a lesser level of care. The federal Medicaid program does provide support for those in senior care facilities but not for home services for individual­s unless special waivers are issued, and Helen has received only a partial waiver and Alex has none — a situation the family is trying to change, and work around, at the same time.

“I’ve heard about people this age divorcing to get medical benefits for both of them when they run out of money. The problem is, they make you live apart,” said Alexis.

“It’s a very sad situation, and in most cases, it would cost the government

less to keep these two at home than to pay for nursing home care. The discrepanc­y is incredible,” she said.

As the costs of care and caretakers rise, their savings have all but disappeare­d, and Alexis and her daughter, Lauren, said they’re doing everything they can to try to keep the couple in their home, which the family has modified extensivel­y to keep the two together. They’ve set up a GoFundMe page for Helen and Alex, with the goal of raising $52,500, the amount they say is needed beyond their current Social Security payments to keep Helen and Alex in the house for a year.

“That would cover one year of care for both of them. That includes everything: food, caregivers; we’re talking everything,” said Alexis.

Staying in the family home instead of an assisted care facility means the Kobasas can still see caretakers and social workers they’ve known for years, while Helen is surrounded by the things that comfort her: family photos of relatives long since passed, souvenirs from family trips, paintings she made and more.

“I got a check in the mail from one friend, and her comment was, ‘Hi, Alexis, how are you? I hope everything is well with your parents. I don’t like Facebook, I don’t like GoFundMe, but I adore your parents, so here is a check,’” Alexis said.

On a Friday afternoon,

Helen sat in her hospitalst­yle bed and watched the snow fall as Alex and Alexis told stories of growing up in the area. Alexis said she is the closest of any family member and visits multiple times a week, and as long as they’re at home, she can share crime detective podcasts with her mother and her father can turn on his laptop and videochat with the rest of the family.

“He said the other day, ‘I’ve gotta remember to pay Helen some more attention, to talk to her more.’ We have one aide that, that’s part of her exercise routine: ‘Mr. Alex, it’s time to go visit Miss Helen, your queen,’” Alexis said.

The Kobasa family believes Helen can still hear and comprehend but not speak, and Alex keeps her company as they watch shows, look at old yearbooks or he works on jigsaw puzzles — always leaving the last piece for a caretaker to finish.

As his daughter held him steady, Alex climbed out of his chair, into his walker, then made his way through the kitchen, across the dining room and next to Helen’s bed.

Alex stooped over to say a silent prayer, then slowly leaned in, as Helen looked up, and said three words as he kissed her forehead. “I love you.”

For more informatio­n on Alex and Helen or to donate, visit gofundme.com/ keep-helen-amp-alex-together.

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