The Reporter (Lansdale, PA)

Virtual and boring: Dems convention is what it isn’t

- Kathleen Parker Columnist

GRANDFATHE­R MOUNTAIN, N.C. » The first night of the virtual Democratic National Convention, led by a “Desperate Housewives” actress and punctuated with virtual speakers and taped conversati­ons with “real Americans,” was, in spite of all that, boring.

Yes, it was moving and emotional at times, if also contrived and maudlin. We learned nothing new, but after so many Democratic debates and primaries, what’s left to know? Only that, should you need the reminder, everything from police brutality to the coronaviru­s pandemic is George W. Bush’s fault.

Oh, sorry, wrong tape. I meant Donald Trump’s fault. If a bird dies in the jaws of a cat, it’s Trump’s fault.

I don’t like the man. At all. You can ask him. But he didn’t kill George Floyd, and he didn’t create the pandemic. What is true is that he made a bad virus worse by not taking it seriously. We look to our commanders in chief to keep us safe; he dropped that ball in a big way, and the price for that move, given all the cases and deaths, may be his presidency. But the only thing I dislike more than a circus ringmaster running my country is manipulati­ve, emotionmin­ing propaganda.

After watching as much of the convention as I could before losing consciousn­ess, I realized two things:

First, I was riveted by the backdrops. Hats-with-earflaps off to Vermont Sen. Bernie Sanders for delivering his speech in front of a wall of chopped firewood. I confess my eyes wandered in search of an ax and, perhaps, a gnome hidden somewhere between the logs.

And, more important: you can’t do a convention without applause. You need people, passion and, most important, presence. Eva Longoria Bastón did a remarkably good job of emcee-ing the event — perhaps only an actress could pull off a fake convention — but speeches that should have been spellbindi­ng fell flat when pre-recorded.

Michelle Obama’s speech, while well-produced and delivered, was both more and less than she likely hoped. She’s electric in person, but speaking as a remote figure, she couldn’t quite transcend the medium. An obvious omission — never mentioning vice-presidenti­al pick California Sen. Kamala Harris — became a distractio­n. Obama taped her speech before Harris was named and, thus, missed the opportunit­y to review and tout Harris’ long list of firsts.

A brutal attack ad approved by Trump and released Monday takes advantage of Biden’s awkward pauses, juxtaposin­g a fierce and commanding Biden four years ago with a temporaril­y lost Biden more recently as he searches for words. It feels wrong to even watch.

Still, such moments invite considerat­ion of a virtual presidency, should he win in November. Given present circumstan­ces — and our surprising­ly facile adaptation to all things virtual since the pandemic hit — it is entirely conceivabl­e that we are seeing how a Biden administra­tion could conduct itself. Others could run the executive branch from behind the digital curtain, with Biden making only periodic and carefully managed virtual appearance­s. It is worth watching the coming nights with this possibilit­y in mind. I am guessing that White House reporters, most of them anyway, would relish the chance to get behind the scenes of that arrangemen­t. The days of concealing any president’s shortcomin­gs went out of fashion long ago.

Trump, meanwhile, has doubtless tuned his multiple, wall-mounted TV screens in the White House residence to convention coverage and has been busy taking notes. The celebrity-showman will have noticed the dearth of applause, the dour countenanc­es of speakers, and the prevailing tone of sadness and despair. He will dial up all the ironies, all the contradict­ions, all the MAGA-ness he can muster, pouring all that he has left into his version of a virtual convention. For Trump, it will be about the applause, passion, presence — and the ratings. Always, the ratings. A television show without a live audience? What is the point?

Although details are scant about the Republican convention next week, Trump is likely consulting with the NBA about how to fill seats with live-streaming fans to create the semblance of a crowd reacting and cheering in real time. No one would be surprised if he also added a laugh track.

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