The Reporter (Lansdale, PA)

It’s always a picture-perfect Christmas with dogs

- Gene Lyons Arkansas Times

Every December, I post the immortal Beverly and Fred Christmas photo for my Facebook friends. It’s a perfect snapshot taken almost 20 years ago, featuring our two basset hounds along with a patient, sweaty Santa Claus hired by the Humane Society.

A 70-pound lap dog, Beverly was only too happy to clamber into a costumed stranger’s lap, while an indignant Fred needed to be restrained from bolting. Even so, he was a photogenic rascal and the picture turned out perfectly in one take — a small Christmas miracle.

Both dogs have been gone for years now, but left behind a precious gift: my wife’s and my determinat­ion never to live without a basset hound. It’s a vow we have kept. The contrast between their woebegone expression­s and loving, perenniall­y optimistic dispositio­ns makes us laugh every day.

Originally bred to track game, the basset’s stubbornne­ss and resistance to instructio­n are legendary. Obedience training is futile. Basically, when their noses are on — which is pretty much always — their ears are off, or may as well be.

Our current basset is a handsome 3-year-old named Hank, or sometimes “Henri” after Diane’s cousin in Baton Rouge. He came to us along with his inseparabl­e friend, a “cowboy corgi” called Marley, who is a year older and acts as if Hank is her son. She certainly thinks she’s the boss, and he doesn’t argue.

Hank and Marley arrived in our lives thanks to a remarkable act of generosity and trust on the part of a younger couple with three small children moving somewhere they couldn’t safely keep them. Well-behaved and trusting, they soon filled the place in our hearts left empty by the sudden, untimely death of our previous basset, Daisy.

They were immediatel­y welcomed by our big dog, Aspen, an 80-pound collie/Great Pyrenees mix who clearly thinks there can never be too many dogs at the party. I’m sure he’d been missing Daisy, who basically raised him.

To give you some idea of Aspen’s generous spirit, we feed all three dogs in the same supper dish, and have never heard a growl. They take turns, smaller dogs first, because although extremely food-motivated, Aspen is essentiall­y a pacifist.

He is also the Brad Pitt of the dog park, where we take the whole team every afternoon, rain or shine. Women in particular are constantly exclaiming about Aspen’s great beauty and asking about his parentage. Some imagine he must be part wolf, particular­ly when he points his muzzle at the sky and howls — most often because he hears his pal Dexter barking excitedly as his owner’s car approaches the park.

Arguably Aspen’s greatest day at the dog park came when some fool showed up with two hyper-aggressive uncut pit bulls — strictly contrary to city law. The pair set out to savage him. Aspen’s reaction was, “You can’t hurt me if you can’t catch me.” By the third lap around the fouracre enclosure — it was over 90 degrees — the would-be killers were staggering.

Somebody spoke with their owner. All three left and never came back. (Many perfectly civilized pits frequent the park with no problems.)

Since Hank the basset hound’s favorite game is “You run, I’ll chase,” he and Aspen made a perfect fit. Aspen lollygags and changes directions to keep Hank hooting and running.

Supervisin­g both is Marley, half-corgi, half-Australian cattle dog and all attitude. Somewhat resembling a black bowling ball with short legs and pointy ears, she’s taken enthusiast­ically to the job of household security. “Officer Marley,” I call her. “Sir, I’m going to need to see some identifica­tion.”

Merry Christmas, y’all.

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