Discovering siblings never known

DEAR ABBY >> I am a 49-year-old woman who never had a father in my life. He was gone shortly after my mother announced she was pregnant. When she contacted him via his family to let him know I was born, he said he didn’t care, he was already with someone else and she was pregnant.

I have always known his name and that he lived in Ohio. Well, thanks to technology, I found him. I would look him up every so often. I just learned he died seven months ago. I saw from his obituary that I have two brothers.

I’m not sure what, if anything, to do. If they don’t know about me, wouldn’t that be a shock? I haven’t told my mother anything about this. I’m not sure how, to be honest. So where am I supposed to go from here?

— Feeling Lost And

Confused

DEAR FEELING LOST >> You should discuss the fact that you have been searching with your mother. If you are looking for a family relationship with your half-brothers, the chances of you finding one are slim. What a healthy person would do in a case like this is build a family of your choosing, with friends who are caring and supportive, and concentrate on the future rather than the past, which you cannot change.

DEAR ABBY >> “Seeking Help in Texas” (July 19) sought assistance for her 24-yearold grandson with Asperger’s syndrome and a bipolar diagnosis. He could apply for career counseling and job placement services from the Vocational Rehabilitation agency serving job seekers with disabilities in his state. In Texas he could contact 800-6285115 or visit twc.state. tx.us/.

Residents in other states can find their VR agencies at rsa.ed.gov/about/states/.

Job seekers are generally eligible for VR Services if they have a physical, mental or visual disability that is a barrier to employment and need vocational rehabilitation services to get or keep a job.

The workplace could also be a great place for the young man to meet people and possibly develop socially, which was a concern in the letter.

— Jody Harlan, Oklahoma Dept. Of Rehabilitation

Services

DEAR JODY >> Thank you for providing additional resources for the young man who is in need of a jumpstart in his life. I am sure they will prove helpful — not only to that family, but also to many other readers with whom that letter resonated.