Worker dreams of trading a cubicle for a classroom

DEAR ABBY: I am 39 and have been at my job for 15 years. I don’t enjoy it and haven’t since day one. The work is stressful and doesn’t bring me one single ounce of gratification.

I have always wanted to be an elementary school teacher, but now I’m afraid that ship has sailed. I’m currently back in college for business (my job helps to pay my tuition) and feel like I’m not being fair to myself. I don’t like finance, and I was never good at math. I get paid well and am well-invested in my retirement plan, but I’m miserable every minute I must sit in my little cubicle. I consider it my jail cell.

I need advice on where to take my career because I’m not getting any younger. Or is it too late?

— OVER THE HILL IN NEW JERSEY

DEAR O.T.H.: You are not incarcerated, and you are only as trapped as you choose to make yourself. Most colleges have career counseling services, and you should avail yourself of them.

If teaching children is your heart’s desire, you will have to take the time to prepare for it, know ahead of time what opportunities are available and what the compensation is. Make it your business to find out before making any drastic changes. You’ll be glad you did.

DEAR ABBY: I fervently want to help my daughter and her father (my ex) fix their relationship. They are both a lot alike — bullheaded and stubborn. They can’t see how much they hurt each other.

My daughter feels he has chosen his “new” family (wife and stepchildren) over her because she isn’t invited to family game nights, dinners out, etc.

He feels she doesn’t appreciate what he does for her.

She’s expecting a baby (our first grandchild) in December, and I think they should try to mend fences before the birth occurs. We lost our son (her brother) three years ago, and I know this figures into the family dynamic as well. I just don’t want to see them hurt each other anymore. Can you help me fix this?

— ANXIOUS IN COLORADO

DEAR ANXIOUS: I wish you had clarified what your ex “does” do for his daughter, because from your description it appears he has done the minimum and little else. Having been excluded from “family game nights and dinners out,” it’s natural that she would feel her father made a new family and left her in the dust.

While I admire your impulse to be the peacemaker, I don’t think you can fix this. Family counseling might be able to mend the rift, but only if all parties are willing.

DEAR ABBY: My wife died on my birthday a few years back. It was the most traumatic thing that has ever happened to me, and my birthday has been depressing since.

Every year, people continue to send cards and gifts, wishing me a happy birthday. All I want to do on that miserable day is get through it. It will never be “happy” for me again. Ever.

I don’t want to be nasty to these wellmeaning people, but I really do want them to stop. How can I convey that my birthday is not a happy occasion anymore?

— PARTY POOPER IN NEW MEXICO

DEAR PARTY POOPER: I am sorry for your loss. A way to ensure your message gets across would be to write or call these well-meaning individuals, thank them for their good wishes and tell them exactly what you have written to me. I think you expressed it very well.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

CELEBRITIES BORN ON THIS DAY: Cam Gigandet, 31; Steve Carell, 51; Angela Bassett, 55; Madonna, 55.

Happy Birthday: Make positive plans regarding your home, family and domestic life. You will learn quickly and should put greater effort into self-improvement and honing skills that will lead to greater success. Socializing and networking will change your life in a positive way by bringing you in to contact with people who can contribute to your life personally and professionally. Your numbers are 7, 14, 17, 23, 30, 37, 43.

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Work in conjunction with others. You will make an impression that will lead to interesting offers. Love is in the picture, but you must protect your emotions initially. Don’t overreact or expect too much in return. Stick to a budget.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Handle discrepancies quickly and constructively. Take charge of whatever situations you face, but be willing to listen to advice or embrace solutions offered by someone with more experience in similar matters. New beginnings will lead to greater optimism.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Take care of personal matters that can improve your current situation. An emotional issue should be turned into a love-fest, not a conquest. Stick to the truth and question anyone offering something that is too good to be true.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Consider what it is you want and how to go about getting it. Focus coupled with a little imagination will lead to success. Love and romance are in the stars, and plans for an enjoyable evening should be put in place.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): A challenge or competition will motivate you. Don’t limit what you can do because someone tampers with your confidence. Show initiative, and you will gain respect. Love is on the rise, and flirting with romance will improve a personal relationship.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Don’t leave anything to chance. Explain your situation thoroughly and discuss the solutions you have come up with

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Discuss your plans and interact with people who can help you reach your goals. Volunteer your services, and you will meet someone unusual who has something to offer you in return. Enjoy spending time with your friends or lover.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Create a workspace at home that will inspire you to complete original ideas, plans or concepts. Working from home will increase your potential to bring in more money. A change in the way you do things will pay off.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Do your best and reflect on the past to help you make the little or additions that will differentiate you from any competition you encounter. A move or short trip will rejuvenate you as well as motivate you to do more.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Look at the facts and figures before making a hasty decision. Being exact is necessary. There is no room for error. Your position can take a positive or negative turn depending on the way you present what you have to offer.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Participation will be your ticket to bigger and better opportunities. Lending a helping hand will encourage new friendships and better partnerships. Good fortune will come through the connections you make. Love is highlighted, and a romantic evening should be planned.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Get involved in activities that allow you to show your talents, skills and generosity. The more established, consistent and stable traits you portray, the more enticing you will be to someone who has exactly what you need to advance.

Birthday Baby: You are charming, charismatic and courageous. You are colorful and entertaining.

For more horoscopes, go to eugenialast.com.