Santa needs the work

Looks like Santa may have hit some hard times. He seems to have taken on several other jobs this year. I have seen him selling everything from vehicles to razors and all things in-between.

Looked up the other day and there was old Mr. Claus on television working in a car dealership selling trucks. I flipped the channel and there was St. Nick pitching me a new electric razor. Turned the channel again and there was Father Christmas telling me all about the virtues of owning a recliner.

We all do what it takes to make ends meet and I can’t fault Santa for taking on the extra work if he can get it. The cost of running that toy factory and paying all those elves must be a very expensive proposition, not to mention feeding and caring for Rudolph and all those other flying reindeer. The insurance premiums on that sleigh must be outrageous.

I’m also sure his equipment and material costs have skyrocketed recently, because he is not making as many wagons and dolls and has to now make more tablets, game consoles and cellphones, because now 8-year-olds want cellphones for Christmas. Can you imagine what he has to pay Apple just to be able to deliver all the iPads, iPods and iPhones these kids want? It must be a fortune.

I’m sure Santa longs for the days when an elf could take some wood, hammer and glue and make a child’s toy. But now that same elf needs a master’s degree in computer science, along with a ton of electrodes, circuits and silicon to make a child’s Christmas wish come true. An elf’s master’s degree alone probably sets old Kriss Kringle back about $120,000.

I don’t want to even think about how St. Nick handles getting through customs for all the different countries. I mean, imagine what he has to do to get in and out of North Korea, Russia and Afghanistan. I’m sure Kim Jong Un and Mr. Putin make it pretty tough on the jolly old elf. But I bet they laugh when they see him, in spite of themselves.

If I’m not mistaken, I’ve seen Mrs. Claus getting into the act, too. I saw her pitching a juicy new hamburger the other day. She has even been spotted touting the benefits of orthopedic shoes. Two-income families have become the norm even at the North Pole.

So I think we can all understand why Santa is looking for extra work. The next time you see the red suited man working his heart out at one of his other jobs, remember, it’s not as easy to be Santa as it used to be. We can all relate to that.