NEWS OF THE WEIRD
Police Report
Former Chadbourn (North Carolina) Police Chief Anthony Spivey, 36, was taken into custody in Conway, South Carolina, on Feb. 24, ending nearly a year of magnificent flouting of the law, WECT-TV reported. It all started in April 2021, when Spivey was charged with more than 70 offenses, mostly related to repeatedly raiding the department’s evidence room and stealing narcotics, cash and firearms. In June, he allegedly embezzled $8,000 meant for a family whose son was battling leukemia. North Carolina Wildlife officers contacted the Columbus County Sheriff’s Office on Feb. 21 about a boat and truck that belonged to Spivey that were found along the Lumber River. Family members told officers the scene might indicate a suicide, and investigators searched the waters and wooded areas nearby for three days. But as the investigation continued, “it became even more apparent that the scene on the river was staged,” they said. He was finally located at his aunt’s apartment in Loris, South Carolina. His total bond is set at $1 million.
It’s Nice to Have a Hobby
People have discovered all sorts of pastimes during COVID-19 lockdowns, and Tom Quirk, 36, is no exception, as Metro News reported on Feb. 23. Quirk, of the Forest of Dean in the United Kingdom, treated himself to a new Shark vacuum a couple of years ago and quickly realized that he could make great art with it. For example, Quirk made a stunningly realistic portrait of Donald Trump in his living room rug, a frightening likeness of Jack Nicholson from “The Shining” (“Here’s Johnny!”) and a pretty good image of Slash. “You have to hoover the rug all over in just one direction first so it gives you an all -over light image,” Quirk said. “Then I remove the hose and add the thin attachment to the end and drag the long fibers the opposite direction to get the shadows of faces. It normally takes about 15 to 20 minutes, which isn’t bad considering it took Leonardo da Vinci four years to do the ‘Mona Lisa.’”
Questionable Judgment
Welcome to Texas, where Sarah Stogner, 37, is running for railroad commissioner against Wayne Christian. Christian has amassed a war chest of $766,000, and Stogner is apparently willing to bare all to win the contest, Canoe reported on Feb. 23: “I have other assets,” she said. To prove it, Stogner posted a 5-second TikTok video of herself wearing only cowboy boots and hat and straddling an oil pumping jack as “Apache” by the Sugarhill Gang played. Unfortunately for her, the stunt may not have worked: She lost the endorsement of the San Antonio Express-News and rankled some religious conservative supporters.
“I knew it would be controversial,” Stogner said. “I didn’t realize it would incite the rage and anger that it did from the press.”
Saving a Buck on Rocket Fuel
An unnamed 22-yearold student at Brigham Young University in Utah was busily trying to make 5 pounds of rocket fuel on Feb. 20 in his dorm kitchen when the mixture exploded, People reported. Flames “engulfed the walls and ceiling around the stove, and the intense heat tripped the fire sprinkler system,” BYU police said in a statement. Although no one was injured, 22 students were relocated while cleanup and repairs were undertaken. Lt. Jeff Long said the student was trying to re-create something he saw online. “He didn’t think this through,” Long said. Which is basically a subhead for every article about a college student.