Sense & Sen­si­tiv­ity



DEAR HAR­RI­ETTE: I have been dat­ing a guy for about four months now. He is very sweet to me. I like his per­son­al­ity a lot. I work in an of­fice as an of­fice man­ager; he works con­struc­tion. I think that’s great, ex­cept that he doesn’t al­ways see the need to shower and change at the end of the day. So if he asks me out on a date, even if he has time to come home, shower and change, he of­ten does not. I don’t mean to sound like a snob, but I don’t re­ally want to go to a nice restau­rant or even to the movies and snug­gle up next to somebody who smells like dust and sweat. I don’t want to hurt his feel­ings, but I need to tell him. -Clean Up, Detroit

DEAR CLEAN UP: I bet your guy has been sin­gle for a long time. One of the most common “side ef­fects” of a loving re­la­tion­ship is some good old TLC. Chances are, he hasn’t put two and two to­gether at all. He is so ea­ger to see you, get­ting to you is top of mind. Bathing is not even on the radar. This may be true for whitecol­lar men, too. It’s just less ob­vi­ous be­cause of the na­ture of their work.

Def­i­nitely tell him, but in a nice way. When you are plan­ning for your next date, ask him what he’s go­ing to wear. En­cour­age him by sug­gest­ing that he shower and wear what­ever cologne you like that he wears, or you could rec­om­mend a spe­cific shirt and tie that you have loved him wear­ing in the past. Make it a sen­su­ous ex­pe­ri­ence. That should en­cour­age him to clean up so that he can en­joy your af­fec­tion more

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