Right-wing scare tac­tics ex­plained

The Taos News - - FAVOR Y CONTRA - Daniel A. Brown is an artist, writer and for­mer pub­lic school teacher liv­ing in Ar­royo Seco.

I make a point of not watch­ing po­lit­i­cal at­tack ads, un­less they am­bush me on tele­vi­sion. Not only do they all sound the same, but I find the sheer ba­nal­ity of them to be of­fen­sive.

While the Democrats have their share of doozies, the Re­pub­li­cans never fail to lower the bar with their de­ceit­ful and, at times, markedly racist of­fer­ings. None of this is new.

The con­ser­va­tive right has al­ways treated Amer­i­can vot­ers like par­tic­u­larly slow chil­dren, us­ing scare tac­tics which shouldn’t fool a smart fourth-grader. As a pub­lic ser­vice, I’d like to of­fer a guide on their meth­ods:

Scary Mu­sic: The back­ground sound­tracks they em­ploy are right out of a 1950s hor­ror movie, usu­ally in the scene where the crea­ture from the Black La­goon car­ries the un­sus­pect­ing damsel off to his wa­tery lair. The ef­fect is to in­spire dread so that the viewer fears that Nancy Pelosi will crawl through their bed­room win­dow at night to haul them off to her wa­tery lair in North­ern Cal­i­for­nia.

Scary Voice-over: Ob­vi­ously, scary mu­sic needs to be ac­com­pa­nied by a scary voiceover. These come in two cat­e­gories: omi­nous and snarky.

The first mim­ics a Boy Scout leader telling a ghost story around a camp­fire. Slow, breath­less and halt­ing, it’s also the voice par­ents use to im­press the Bo­gey­man on re­cal­ci­trant chil­dren. On the flip side, snark em­ploys the vul­gar, im­ma­ture tone one finds among drunken frat boys, like Brett Ka­vanaugh and his ilk.

Once the mood of im­pend­ing ter­ror has been es­tab­lished, it’s time to lie about con­tent with spe­cially cho­sen scare words. In do­ing so, Re­pub­li­cans ad­here to the maxim that if you tell a big lie of­ten enough, it even­tu­ally be­comes truth. It’s the old­est tac­tic of dem­a­gogues ev­ery­where, but un­for­tu­nately, it seems to work.

So­cial­ists and So­cial­ism: These are the main scare words in the Repub­li­can vo­cab­u­lary, never mind that the av­er­age right-wing voter doesn’t un­der­stand what they mean. No mat­ter, they con­jure up im­ages of Com­mie tanks rum­bling down Main Street USA de­spite the fact the Don­ald Trump is cur­rently con­duct­ing bro­mances with Kim Jong-Un and Vladimir Putin, the worst Com­mu­nists of them all.

Those aw­ful so­cial­ists de­mand ter­ri­ble things, such as a liv­ing wage, de­cent and safe work­ing con­di­tions and a greater in­come equal­ity to make the Amer­i­can Dream a re­al­ity for all Amer­i­cans, not a cho­sen few. If we’re not care­ful, the United States will wind up like those Demo­cratic So­cial­ist Scan­di­na­vian coun­tries that have the high­est stan­dard of liv­ing in the world. Shock­ing!

Nancy Pelosi: A some­what bland and bor­ing Demo­cratic leader, Pelosi has be­come the bête noire of the po­lit­i­cal spec­trum. Ac­cord­ing to the Re­pub­li­cans, she now has su­per­nat­u­ral pow­ers and is poised to in­flict her hideous agenda on any Demo­crat seek­ing pub­lic of­fice. A di­a­bol­i­cal Machi­avelli, Pelosi’s agenda in­cludes es­tab­lish­ing lob­by­ing and ethics re­forms, low­er­ing the cost of health in­sur­ance pre­scrip­tion drugs and pre­mi­ums and spend­ing $1 tril­lion on in­fra­struc­ture im­prove­ments. Gasp!

Ge­orge Soros: This bil­lion­aire donor is the evil master­mind of the Demo­cratic Party and in the eyes of neo-Nazis (some of whom are nice peo­ple) is a linch­pin of the in­ter­na­tional Jewish con­spir­acy to rule the world. Soros has ap­par­ently paid all those tens of mil­lions of demon­stra­tors you’ve seen on tele­vi­sion protest­ing in the streets. As a re­sult, Soros is cur­rently bank­rupt and was last seen beg­ging at the Old Blink­ing Light in­ter­sec­tion north of town. Funny, though, most of my friends and I par­tic­i­pated in those demon­stra­tions and never re­ceived a cent.

Im­mi­grants: like pick­ing let­tuce, clean­ing toi­lets and chang­ing di­a­pers for $5 an hour.

They can’t take over the good jobs be­cause the Repub­li­can Party’s main donors have al­ready shipped them over­seas to avoid pay­ing Amer­i­can taxes. As far as rape and mur­der, the GOP has no prob­lem run­ning child mo­lesters and would-be rapists for pub­lic of­fice, and they are fine with schoolchil­dren be­ing mas­sa­cred in their class­rooms by pa­tri­otic, all-Amer­i­can killers.

So there you have it. Upon every elec­tion, Re­pub­li­cans vote their fears. Pro­gres­sives vote their dreams. Maybe some­day, Amer­i­cans will smarten up and vote their brains.

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