Tall Tales of Johnny Mudd
Chapter 3b: All that glitters
Although the pearls looked very pretty, glistening in the sun, they grew very hot in the light of day. “It is no wonder that pearls grow inside oyster shells under water in the Rocky Mountains where it is much fresher,” Ole Johnny Mudd said to himself. Soon he took them all off and he got on his horse. He continued walking among the silence of the Rocky Mountains. He was so tired that everywhere he began to see mirages: he thought that he saw puddles of fresh water everywhere, but when he got to them, they would all disappear. Once he even thought that he saw a big town just beyond the Rocky Mountains. “It’s not possible!” he exclaimed to himself. “How can there possibly be a town between the mountains and the desert?” But the closer he got, he saw that there truly was a town named “Las Vegas.” There were many lamps lighting the road, but there were no people.
The moment that the sun set and the moon came out, many people came outside to celebrate on the street. The stars glittered in the sky like so many diamonds. The night sky over Las Vegas was very glamorous. When many of the people saw that Ole Johnny Mudd had many sacks of gold, they all wanted to be his friends. They were very anxious to invite him to come into their casinos to spend some of his gold that they could get richer too. Ole Johnny Mudd looked into the casinos and taverns. He had just spent a lot of time during the hot day outside, but now he had a lot of gold and even more pearls. Ole Johnny Mudd felt like betting on something in the casinos; he might even add to his riches. He walked through some swinging doors and right away a stout gentleman came forward to receive him, bidding him welcome into his casino.
There were two rogues playing a card game at one of the tables. They were playing a card game called “Old Maid.” When they saw that Ole Johnny Mudd had a lot of money, they invited him to come to the table to bet with them. The taller of the two men was named “Fulano.” The shorter one was named “Mangano.” In two shakes of a lamb’s tail the two rogues had swindled all the gold from Ole Johnny Mudd and they still wanted to bet some more against him to see for how much they could still take him. Ole Johnny stopped to think for a moment.
“I bet you guys everything that you have on the table,” he proposed to them, “that I can bite one of my eyes. If you win, then I’ll double all your winnings.” The two rogues looked at each other sneakily because they knew that it not possible for a man to bite his own eye.
The two rogues Fulano and Mangano bet everything that they had on the table trying to double all their riches. They were sure that they were going to win and live happily the rest of their lives. But Ole Johnny Mudd wasn’t afraid at all. The two rogues didn’t know that he had a secret. He stood in front of the rogues and he took out the false glass eye that he had and without further ado and stuck it in his mouth and he bit it with his teeth. The two rogues hadn’t even counted on him having a false glass eye. They were furious with him. Ole Johnny Mudd had tricked them! Quickly they placed some gold bars on the table and they called out: “Now let’s bet big time and whosoever wins, will triple all his wealth. “What else do you have to bet?” Ole Johnny Mudd answered: “I have a whole slew of pearls that I took out of some Rocky Mountain oysters. Fulano and Mangano had never seen so many Rocky Mountain oyster pearls. With all those pearls they were going to end up richer than kings. Quicker than it takes to tell, they decided to let Ole Johnny Mudd bet whatever he wanted.