Mind over matter
Local journalist on the road to recovery
Andrew Hay may never be able to walk again, but he hasn’t let that stop him from living his life.
After a dizzy spell led to a fall from a ladder on Oct. 11, 2020, Hay was paralyzed from the chest down. As a journalist, family man, homesteader, runner, biker and active community member, Hay’s inability to use his legs left him at first discouraged, but then he realized life goes on, much as it did before, even after a debilitating injury.
“I was just climbing up a ladder at my in-laws’ house to saw a
branch off and I got about 10 feet up and had a dizzy spell and just fell backwards onto a flagstone path. So my back hit the path and broke. Luckily my head hit the grass, or I would have probably had a traumatic brain injury as well,” said Hay.
Thanks to a helpful treatment program at Craig Hospital in Englewood, Colorado, a sturdy local support network and a strong sense of mental resilience, Hay has begun making his reentry into everyday life – reporting for his job at Reuters, driving his daughter to ballet class and adjusting to a life that demands he be at his fittest every day, both physically and mentally.
As he geared up to get on his adaptive bike which he pedals with his hands, he reminded
himself how much he is still able to do. “It’s a mind thing,” he said.
Adapting to a dramatic change
“This is my little world here,” Hay said at his home on Witt Road in Cañon this month.
Over the last year, Hay has gradually converted a separate studio space on his property into a living space where he can work and exercise, without allowing the fact that he can’t walk to interfere with his day-to-day routine. He has adaptive equipment (tools that help him maneuver), two computers for him to continue his reporting work, a bathroom and a small kitchenette.
“Out there, it’s not a very adapted world,” Hay, 51, said, but at home he’s been able to build in all of the necessary supports that
people with similar injuries don’t always find in public spaces.
He said going out to do regular things outside his home can be jarring “if you get used to everything being sort of perfect,” said Hay.
He applies a different sort of adaptive mindset when he goes out.
“If you go to hotels, often they don’t have a wheelchair accessible room … It kind of helps to just get used to finding solutions rather than seeing problems,” he said.
“It just happened,” he said of the incident. “I think I’m sort of getting to the point where I’m not angry about it … I’ve got nobody really to blame but me, which makes it sort of easier.”
Hay said it was easy to look to others to provide solutions for him immediately after the accident to become dependent. Gradually he looked toward a more inward orientation, where he finds and applies the necessary solution to the challenges he encounters in every day life on his own terms.
Life changes
As a 20-year veteran reporter with Reuters New Agency, which is headquartered in London, Hay is no stranger to working remotely and covering news from a distance. When the pandemic hit, not too much changed; he still worked from home, turning in assignments remotely and meeting with coworkers on Zoom.
When the accident happened, Reuters allowed him to take time off. From October 2020 to May 2021, Hay remained focused on his recovery. But since June he has been back at it, but admittedly taking it a little easier than he used to.
He said he is still learning how to cope with the changes the way he does his job, but is thankful to have the distraction that his work provides. “You really need a focus other than your injury,” he said.
“With a spinal cord injury this is day to day,” he said. “You just don’t quite know what’s going to hit you the next day or how much energy you’re going to have.”
Most of all, he said he is trying to put his family and his health in front of his job. “Before the injury, I kind of had it sort of the work life balance a little out of whack.”
A crucial support network
Without the help of family and friends, Hay said shifting his mindset from one of discouragement to one that enabled him to move forward with his recovery would not have been easy to do.
His wife, Jesse, and three children have been crucial in all stages of his recovery, he said, as well as the help of the surrounding community he has connected with over his years in Taos, where he and his family have resided since 2009.
Jesse admitted it wasn’t easy dealing with such a major life change in the family. “Our life as we knew it was gone in a split second,” she said. From the moment the accident occurred, Jesse said she was focused on getting the best care for Andrew and managing their children’s schedules.
“I went from having a partner who helped with the house, the kids, the shopping, etc. to being a sort of single mother of three and a caregiver,” she said. “Andrew is incredibly independent thanks to the rehabilitation hospital, but he is also not well a lot still too.”
Hay said his oldest son has encouraged him to stay positive and has helped him by assembling adaptive equipment, like an armbike and an attachable front wheel for his wheelchair.
Along with his family, Hay has found resounding support from the Taos community, where he has always been an active member.
Tze Yong, a doctor at Holy Cross Medical Center and good friend of Hay, took it upon himself to start a GoFundMe online fundraiser to help with Hay’s medical bills. When the fundraiser was closed just two weeks ago, a total of $88,668 had been raised.
Hay said if it weren’t for the donations and GoFundMe, he wouldn’t be able to afford certain necessities like some of his adaptive gear.
“When this accident happened it almost happened to the perfect person, because we knew that with his personality and their family that they would be able ... to make it out of this on the positive end,” said Yong.
“In rehab, they teach you to become independent, but really you need to become interdependent,” said Hay, adding that he has “a team of people” behind him.
While he was working on his recovery at Craig Hospital, friends and family helped build a flagstone path around his property, something Hay said he is extremely grateful for.
Making the most of it
Hay’s mental fortitude has been critical to his recovery, but he admitted that he struggled at first.
“You either start living or you kind of start dying ... it’s a sort of choice,” said Hay. “It’s gonna hurt no matter what; it sucks no matter what. So you’ve just got to choose what you’re going to do.”
As an avid outdoor enthusiast, Hay’s first concern was with all of the things he loved to do but believed he couldn’t anymore – thoughts that left him feeling low. He said he forced himself to change his thought process from “I can’t” to “I can.”
He said this means appreciating the things he is still able to accomplish, like riding an adaptive bike, helping with the garden, and cooking meals. He is also looking forward to adaptive skiing when he’s moved further along in his recovery.
“It’s a big mind game, it really is,” he said. In his darkest moments, he tries not to feel like “just a guy in a wheelchair.”
In Hay’s case, he said pride was a major issue in overcoming his initial acknowledgement of his disability.
“I was used to running and biking and riding horses,” he said. “Then all of a sudden I was pushing myself up Witt Road in a wheelchair … and it took a long time to get over that.”
“The body really does want to overcome if you give it a chance; if exercise becomes sort of like your medicine, then your body will try to heal itself … but if you lie in bed you just get worse and worse.”
Hay said one day he hopes to regain function in his legs.
“I continue to see small improvements in feeling,” he said. “The game changer is once I see muscle movement in my legs.”
“Maybe one day I’ll get back on a horse again, who knows.”