Standing the test of time
Five moves, two children, many losses… and they're still here.
That 22-year-old Coastie and 18-year-old city girl, never thought about too far into the future on that July 7, 1962, day. They believed they had chosen a life-mate, accepting each other as they were, and who they might become.
For Ted and Carole Hester, it was choosing to stand together and face the world, finding the capacity to forgive and forget, even when it was difficult and hurt. They both agree, marriage is not just about marrying the right person; it is also about being the right partner. It's also about demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways, speaking words of appreciation, praying for each other faithfully.
They started College of Marin together, then moved to Fresno in 1964 for Ted to attend Fresno State University, one of the first in a new program. Carole went to work, as a legal secretary, then for the Calif. Baptist Foundation. Their first child, John David, was born in 1968; their second child, Bonnie Suzanne, was born in 1970.
The couple moved to Santa Maria where Ted began his first stint up the corporate ladder with PG&E. After a couple of years, they moved to Petaluma where Ted commuted to San Francisco to PG&E; the moved to Concord where Ted commuted to Oakland. In 1980 the family moved to Fresno for five years before their final move to Ukiah in 1985.
While in Concord, Carole finished her BA at St. Mary's of Moraga. She served as music worship leader in most of the churches they attended over the years and is still singing her heart out.
William Shakespeare wrote, “With mirth and laughter let old wrinkles come.”
Well, the wrinkles are present and accounted for, as well as bodies trying to get up every morning.
One person stated, “One percent of marriages reach the diamond, or 60th anniversary.”
From the beginning “I Do,” this couple dedicated their new relationship to Jehovah God. One person put
They are not afraid to disagree with each other because disagreement does not make one an enemy (unlike much of our world today). They both agree that the secret to a lasting marriage is:
• Work hard
• Be kind to one another
• Think before you speak
• Rely on each other's strengths to overcome your weakness
• Stay strong in your faith
• A friend is what the heart needs all the time…
The greatest gift of life is friendship, and they have received it from each other. The past 60 years have not been a bed of roses. Were there times they wanted to run away? Perhaps put a hit out on the partner? Of course! But at the end of any day, they are best friends and believe that the only way to have a friend is to be one.
The first thing Carole noticed when introduced to Ted over 60 years ago was his warm smile. She has consistently said of him, “You are one of the strongest people I know… your character, your honesty, you're always looking out for me has made you my hero for decades! Life isn't so scary when you are here — and I love that you will go with me to the movies, even though you don't like movies — just to please me!” “Grow old along with me / The best is yet to be.” — Robert Browning's 1864 poem “Rabbi ben Ezra.”