Best day of my life

As goes the old joke, there are three kinds of people: those who are good at math and those who are not. (Insert rimshot…) OK, to that end, when it comes to calendars and appointments, there are two types of people: those of us who use electronic calendars and then there are “those other types.”

I used to be of “the others.”

As year's end approached, I'd debate about having to spend $15 for an upmarket calendar with motivational expressions or pictures of Hawaiian sunsets, finally opting to settle for one given to me gratis by my insurance agent. In the end, I eventually migrated from paper to smartphone and now every reminder, anniversary, birthday, deadline and appointment fits neatly in my pocket. No longer do I spend early January copying them over from last year's calendar.

My wife and I have a mixed marriage. She is of “the others.” Pointing out that it wouldn't be as humorous in an electronic calendar version, she showed me an amusing posting on Facebook, an image entitled “a dog's calendar.” It was a nonspecific month with dated boxes labeled “1” to “31.” In each and every square, “handwritten” (as if dogs can write), it simply said, “The best day of my life.”

Being the guardian of Willie, a mini-schnauzer/poodle combination (called a “schnoodle”), I related well, as would any dog parent. No matter what, we can count on Willie to be filled with gladness and excitement at the smallest event. I come in from a day of errands. I'm greeted with jubilant abandon and a fast-moving wagging stubby tail. Time to eat? More wagging. Making a nest out of the blankets on the couch? Wag the whole time. The first thing he does when he wakes up in the morning is scurry downstairs, find the nearest human, leap on his or her lap — try and lick their face, and of course wag. I saw one of those “Americana-type” wall decorations that said, “Dog is another way to say uncontrollable joy.” True that.

After chuckling at the image, I said to my beloved, “If only we could feel that way…” In unison, we sighed and agreed. “If only…”

Then, the thought crossed my mind, “Why don't we try?”

I mean, OK, sure, that might be a bit difficult to achieve, and true, we don't stand at our picture window and get so excited that we bounce if we see another human walking past. Of course, it would also be inappropriate to bristle with anticipation because you're going to go on a walk and you can pee on signposts. Yet, that all said, it couldn't hurt to try and emulate our canine friends' attitudes — at least somewhat — could it?

As I'm writing this, due to all the rain, our garage is flooded, which is overworking our sump pump, causing it to wheeze and grind each time it does its thing. It might give out, and that's causing concern. Because of the extreme cold we're experiencing — plus having guests in the house — our power bill has doubled. Due to the extremely high water table, we are also victims of what I am sure is a coordinated assault of escaping black ants that are invading every square inch of our house. I'm considering raising the white flag and simply surrendering the house. Let them find a plumber.

It sucks to be us.

Or does it?

At the same time as this slow-moving “disaster” is unfolding, I'm safely sitting in front of a computer monitor, typing out my thoughts so that thousands of people will read them. My house is heated — even at twice the expense. Short of a few sniffles, my health is fine. I've got several “irons in the fire” that could lead to exciting opportunities. I get to be creative. And — worst comes to worst — I have enough money in the bank that I can afford to pay for the power bill. (Besides, once the ants take over ownership, it becomes their problem.)

How cool is that?

I'm sure, if you took a minute to put yourself in check, you've probably got some similar upbeat observations you could share. Truth be told, it might not be the best day of my life, but it's the only one I've got — and it ain't that bad. What's of note is that both versions of this same day exist at the exact same time. Which one will I record on my calendar?

Scott “Q” Marcus, RSCP, is a life coach and Religious Science Practitioner, as well as a professional speaker and the founder of the inspirational Facebook Group, Intentions Affirmations Manifestations. He is directing and featured in the world premiere event, “Never After Happily,” at the North Coast Repertory Theater in Eureka.