It must be true...

I read it in the tabloids

A French chef is suing the Michelin Guide for slanderously accusing him of using cheddar cheese in a soufflé. Marc Veyrat said his world-renowned restaurant La Maison des Bois was downgraded from three stars to merely two after a Michelin inspector with an unsophisticated palate mistook the ingredients in a soufflé actually composed of fine French cheeses. “I put saffron in it, and the gentleman who came thought it was cheddar because it was yellow,” Veyrat said. “It’s worse than a wound. It’s profoundly offensive. It gave me a depression.”

A billy goat named Big Boy escaped an Ohio farm, shattered a local home’s sliding glass door, and was found napping in its bathroom. Logan Keathley, 18, returned home from school to find the family dog frantically barking in the driveway, with glass strewn about the back porch and the house reeking of urine. Police couldn’t coax Big Boy out of the bathroom with carrots, so they wrestled him out by the horns. “My house definitely smells like a goat farm,” said Jennifer Keathley, Logan’s mom. “But there’s nothing you can do but laugh.” A Russian man is suing Apple for allegedly turning him gay. The plaintiff, D. Razumilov, says the trouble started when a cryptocurrency app he downloaded to his iPhone delivered 69 “GayCoins” instead of the Bitcoin he expected. “Don’t judge until you try,” read a note from GayCoin. In his lawsuit, Razumilov said, “I thought, in truth, how can I judge something without trying? Now I have a boyfriend and I do not know how to explain this to my parents.” He wants 1 million rubles from Apple, or about $16,000.