It must be true...

I read it in the tabloids

■ A guilt-racked burglar in New Mexico was busted after unknowingly stealing two televisions while drunk and then returning them to his victim. Sage Aaron Cummins, 24, told police he was “very intoxicated” when he knocked on the victim’s door and, receiving no answer, walked inside. The next morning, he awoke with no memory of the incident but “noticed he had two TVs in his room” that hadn’t previously been there. Days later, a mutual friend of Cummins and the victim informed the former whom he’d stolen from, but when the unwitting burglar brought back the TVs, a cop on the scene arrested him. ■ An iconoclastic forklift driver from Canada has remade his life by tattooing himself almost entirely in a Smurf-like blue. Donnie Snider, 26, said his decision was rooted in a desire to “quit hiding” and “break myself out of stagnation.” Since then, he’s slowly transformed almost every inch of his body, including his face. Reactions have been mixed, including “gasps,” “free beers,” “flirting,” “fist bumps,” and “hugs.” “It’s like living life in strange-mode,” he said. “It’s definitely striking, and I think it’s a beautiful color.”

■ A Canadian band called the Shaft Bottom Boys set a world record for the “deepest concert” by performing for 50 miners at the bottom of one of the deepest mines in the world. The band snatched the record by belting out Bruce Springsteen, Neil Young, and Johnny Cash songs at a depth of 6,213 feet below sea level inside a nickel mine in Ontario. “I was quite emotional when we went off the stage,” said vocalist Steve Atkins, while bassist John Shelegey described the experience as “extremely surreal.”