Fluid situation would spoil epic
Prepare for the ultimate battle: the three-hour run time of “Avengers: Endgame.”
Fans struggling to get through the longest Marvel movie ever – officially clocking in at three hours and 58 seconds with no intermission – will have the same grim looks as the superheroes fighting mighty Thanos in the epic finale (officially opening Friday, but theaters will show it Thursday night).
“Endgame” stars have even discussed solutions, with Mark Ruffalo suggesting at the world premiere that fans wear a diaper and Paul Rudd recommending a giant tub of popcorn (“Lower it under the seat in the middle of the movie, and then you don’t have to get up,” he told Jimmy Kimmel).
This is serious, people. Here’s our real “Avengers: Endgame” survival guide.
Monitor fluid intake
“A three-hour movie is a tough one,” says David Ginsberg, professor of clinical urology at USC’s Keck School of Medicine. “God forbid you head out to the toilet during a key point. People are going to have to be strategic about what they eat and drink.”
It’s a matter of paying attention to fluid volume, he says. Cut down on drinks consumed before and during the movie – especially alcohol and caffeine, which are diuretics that increase urine output.
Warning: Salty snacks like movie popcorn increase thirst, and movie drinks are generous in size.
Ginsberg says thoughtfully sipped water will “optimize your chance to make it three hours.”
If you have to go, choose wisely
The RunPee app was created to give moviegoers a specific, non-crucial time to sprint for the loo.
Despite the secrecy around “Avengers: Endgame,” the app’s staff (called Pee-ons) will have a correspondent at a pre-release screening to ensure a bathroom-break recommendation before opening night.
RunPee creator Dan Gardner says he’s already seeing the beginning of what looks to be the motherlode of worldwide app downloads before “Endgame.”
“Just because someone has the bladder capacity to hold it three hours, they may not be able to hold it comfortably,” he says. “Use a recommended pee time around the movie midpoint, so you can enjoy the ending in comfort, not agony.”
Spring for amenities
This is the time to search out theaters with killer seats. AMC has 300 locations nationwide with power recliners, as do smaller chains including Cinepolis USA, with 13 recliner-equipped locations. Or indulge in an iPic theater (16 locations), where seating includes reclining chairs, a blanket and pillow, and silent “ninja” waiter service, which comes right to your seat.
Choose costumes strategically
“People are freaked about the ‘Endgame’ length, but it won’t stop people from dressing up. This is too big an event,” says Nikki Novak, a correspondent for the ticket website Fandango .com, who frequently joins fellow cosplayers in superhero attire.
For “Endgame,” Novak suggests factoring in the long sit when selecting a costume.
Most are onesies, which make for comfortable seating but some difficulty in the privy. Also keep in mind that Captain America shields, Thor hammers and other heroic accessories will have to fit somewhere in a crowded theater.
Don’t start an infinity war with fans sitting nearby
Be a good neighbor; three hours can be a long time for conflict. Turn off the phone right away, and keep it off. Don’t converse during the show.
Keep any small bags off the floor, says Regina Leeds, author of “One Year to An Organized Life.”
It’s unhygienic and others will trip over it in the dark.
“And even if it’s hot, wrap a sweater around your waist,” Leeds says. “You don’t want to be miserably cold from air conditioning for three hours.”