One Constant Is This: God Loves You, Swaying Decisions & All

If you’re always worrying about what you don’t have, you’ll get less and less of what you really want.

“And do not set your heart on what you will eat or drink; do not worry about it. For the pagan world runs after all such things, and your Father knows that you need them. But seek His kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well.” Luke 12:29-30 Over the years, I’ve taken several different kinds of personality tests. It seems like every time I turn around, clergy are taking different personality tests. Not really sure why. I always flunk. Seriously. With every personality test, I fit into each category and no category at the same time. I love to plan things. I make meal plans. I prepare for trips. I plan for long-term projects and ministries. But, I’m not a planner. I don’t follow recipes. To me recipes are just suggestions. I don’t pack until about an hour before leaving. And, I change the details of longterm plans to fit the changing circumstances.

I fiercely love to be alone. Especially during prayer or preparing sermons. Sometimes, I just need to get away from everything. So, I’m an introvert. At the same, I thrive on being around people. I love Wednesday nights and Sunday mornings. And when I’m not with people, I miss them greatly. So, I’m an extrovert. I have a knack for seeing the big picture of things. The grand plans and the way everything works together to create systems and communities. I’m intuitive.

But at the same time, even though I see the world in shades of gray, I also see it in black and white. So, I’m not so intuitive. I instead act on feelings and not my intuition.

I’m a neat freak in some things and a slob in others.

I always show up early, but quite often procrastinate. I’m a sinner and a saint. Holy and sometimes hedonistic.

I give sacrificially, but work to buy more stuff.

I love mustard on hot dogs but mayonnaise on hamburgers.

And, truthfully, I think most of us fall into the either/or categories.

In Scripture, we see where Abraham was the father of many nations, but he also was a liar. ( Genesis 20: 2) Moses was the leader of his nation, but a murderer. (Exodus 2:12) David was the king of the nation, but also an adulterer. (2 Samuel 11:2) John the Baptist baptized God, but he still had doubts. ( Matthew 11: 2- 3) Peter preached peace, but swung a sinister sword. (John 18:10) The disciple John went on to become a poetic evangelist, but like to streak. (Mark 14:51-52).

In reality, we can’t be so readily defined. We love, we hate, we sin, we pray, we laugh, we cry, we’re holy and we’re sinful.

But during all these divergent personalities, undefinable ways of learning and atypical dispositions, one thing always remains the same.

God’s love for you. John 3:16. Let us pray. Good and gracious God. Sometimes we don’t know which way to turn or what decisions to make. We sway in the winds of life and make decisions that defy logic. In the midst of our turmoils, show us your steadfast grace through Jesus Christ. In Christ’s name we pray. Amen.

The blessings of our Lord Jesus Christ be upon you.

PASTOR TROY CONRAD IS MINISTER OF THE FARMINGTON UNITED METHODIST CHURCH. EMAIL: FARMINGTONCHURCH@PGTC.COM. THE OPINIONS EXPRESSED ARE THOSE OF THE AUTHOR.