What Day Is It Again?

When we miss church, the days of the following week are so mixed up, I have a hard time remembering which is which. Now, these past months of confusion is worse. It doesn’t help to look at the calendar, unless I remember to mark each one.

The daily paper was once a help, when our paper was delivered every day, including Sunday. Now, delivered by mail, it comes a day late, and sometimes no paper at all. So, on Monday comes Saturday and Sunday’s edition, with no Monday’s as it arrives on Tuesday. This week, we received Friday’s on Monday.

I wonder, is it the mail or paper delivery fault.

I’m not complaining, just explaining why I am so confused.

Now, change to something more cheerful.

Rates Have Gone Down A man decided to write a book about Churches in the United States. He went to San Francisco to visit Grace Cathedral and began taking pictures.

As he was about to leave, he spotted a golden telephone on the wall with a sign above it: “$10,000 a minute.”

Intrigued, he sought out the minister and asked about the phone and sign. The pastor explained, “Oh, the golden phone is a direct line to Heaven. If you use it, you can talk directly to God.”

The man thanked the pastor and continued on his way. As he traveled, he found a similar phone with the same sign in churches throughout the country. At each site, he made the same inquiry and received the same answer from the minister.

Finally, he arrived in Alaska. Upon entering a church in Anchorage, he noticed the same golden telephone, but this time the sign above it said, “Calls .25 cents each.”

He sought out the pastor and said, I’ve been to churches all over the country and found a golden telephone just like the one here. At each church I was told it was a direct line to Heaven and that I could speak personally with God.

“But in all other churches, the cost was $ 10,000 a minute. Why does yours cost only .25 cents?”

The minister smiled and said, “It’s simple, my son. Your’e in God’s Country now, and it’s a local call from here.”

Happy birthday to Jason Moorman, Melissa Little, Kelly Loftin, Jim Griffin, Paul Braly, Wayne Cruickshank, Edward Bailey, Linda Myers.

Happy anniversary to John and Linda Munyon, Josh and Kendra Moore, Wendell and Teresa Pershall.

Happy years, all!

MARIE ROY IS A LONG-TIME RESIDENT OF LINCOLN AND HAS WRITTEN A COMMUNITY COLUMN FOR THE ENTERPRISELEADER FOR MANY YEARS.

THE OPINIONS EXPRESSED ARE THOSE OF THE AUTHOR.