Hard-work­ing col­lege stu­dent strives to be more or­ga­nized DEAR ABBY

Woonsocket Call - - AMUSEMENTS - Jeanne Phillips

DEAR ABBY: I am a 20-year-old col­lege stu­dent. Af­ter at­tend­ing a lo­cal com­mu­nity col­lege for two years, I will be start­ing classes at a four-year school. I make ex­cel­lent grades, but I strug­gle with or­ga­ni­za­tion. My mother has ADD, and I am cer­tain that I also have it be­cause I dis­play all the symp­toms. How­ever, I have never been di­ag­nosed. My mother pur­posely didn’t have me di­ag­nosed as a child be­cause she didn’t want me to feel like there was any­thing hold­ing me back. Now that I’m an adult, I keep won­der­ing if get­ting a di­ag­no­sis along with some men­tal and emo­tional sup­port might help me to be­come more or­ga­nized and suc­cess­ful in life. Any ad­vice would be ap­pre­ci­ated, along with any re­sources you might know of for peo­ple who have ADD or ADHD.


DEAR ANONY­MOUS: Be­cause you feel that re­ceiv­ing a di­ag­no­sis would be help­ful, it’s time to be eval­u­ated by a men­tal health pro­fes­sional. If your col­lege has a stu­dent health cen­ter, that’s the place to start. If not, con­tact the psy­cho­log­i­cal as­so­ci­a­tion in your state about a re­fer­ral to a ther­a­pist who spe­cial­izes in pa­tients with adult at­ten­tion deficit dis­or­der. I wish you luck, be­cause there is help for it.


My boyfriend and I have been dat­ing ca­su­ally for about five months. He is busy and is of­ten ter­ri­ble about re­turn­ing texts and phone calls. For his birthday, I bought him a gift that I had put a lot of thought into. We made plans to have din­ner on his birthday, but when the time came to pick me up, he didn’t show. Three hours af­ter the agreed-upon time, he texted and can­celed. My ques­tion is about the gift. It wasn’t ex­trav­a­gant, but I no longer have any in­ter­est in giv­ing it to him when we do fi­nally see each other (it’s been a week since he can­celed). Is it ac­cept­able to sim­ply pay for din­ner? I’m hurt and frus­trated with him, and that doesn’t make me want to give him a gift.


DEAR HURT: If he had wanted to spend his birthday with you, he would have shown up. One of the ways peo­ple show they care about each other is by re­turn­ing texts and ini­ti­at­ing phone calls. Be­cause your “boyfriend” hasn’t done that, as­sume that he is not as in­ter­ested in you as you are in him. Re­turn the gift, if pos­si­ble, and if he shows up again, do not buy the din­ner. Shame on him.


When my wife shops for clothes, she of­ten re­turns some­thing for ex­change or re­im­burse­ment. Re­cently she bought an ar­ti­cle of cloth­ing and it shrank af­ter she washed it, so she re­turned it. To me that was in­ap­pro­pri­ate. I think af­ter a gar­ment is washed it be­longs to the buyer, and a re­turn is wrong. Or am I wrong?


DEAR RE­TURNED: Per­son­ally, I agree with you – un­less the item was sup­posed to be shrink-re­sis­tant. How­ever, be­cause the re­tailer was will­ing to ex­change it or re­im­burse your wife, it ap­pears we are mis­taken. Dear Abby is writ­ten by Abi­gail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Con­tact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los An­ge­les, CA 90069. Abby shares more than 100 of her fa­vorite recipes in two book­lets: “Abby’s Fa­vorite Recipes” and “More Fa­vorite Recipes by Dear Abby.” Send your name and mail­ing ad­dress, plus check or money or­der for $14 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby, Cook­book­let Set, P.O. Box 447, Mount Mor­ris, IL 61054-0447. (Ship­ping and han­dling are in­cluded in the price.)


For­mer foot­ball player and ac­tor Rosey Grier is 86. Ac­tor Vin­cent Pa­s­tore is 72. Mu­sic com­pany ex­ec­u­tive Tommy Mot­tola is 70. Singer-gui­tarist Kyle Gass is 58. Ac­tor Jackie Earle Ha­ley is 57. Ac­tor Matthew Fox is 52. Rock mu­si­cian Ellen Reid (Crash Test Dum­mies) is 52. Rock singer-mu­si­cian Tanya Donelly is 52. Olympic gold medal snow­boarder Ross Re­bagliati is 47. Rhythm-and-blues singer Tameka Cot­tle (Xs­cape) is 43. Coun­try singer Jamey John­son is 43. Hip-hop mu­si­cian taboo (Black Eyed Peas) is 43. Rock singer Dan Smith (Bastille) is 32. Ac­tress Sara Can­ning (TV: “The Vam­pire Diaries”) is 31. Rock singer Dan Reynolds (Imag­ine Drag­ons) is 31.

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