A blended family is a beautiful thing worth cherishing
Divorce is quite common in our culture, and statistics show that almost half of us will experience it. Although I am firmly against it, I strongly advocate exhausting all resources before calling it quits. As a child of divorced parents, I have to admit that it is possible to recover and even appreciate the unforeseen aftermath. For me, my parents’ divorce lead to some great advantages.
My parents divorced when I was nine years old. My dad soon after remarried and before I knew it, my family had doubled in size! It’s hard for two families to adjust and become one family unit. I have spent two thirds of my life in a blended family. Sometimes it is still difficult to explain my family to others. Regardless of the hardship and the predictable family drama, I know that time helped us to create and foster strong love for one another.
I often tell my students how important it is to cultivate a meaningful relationship with siblings. They are the people who will be around when the time comes to say goodbye to our beloved parents and they are the only ones who shared in our childhood. Siblings are special because of their potential of being around for our entire lifespan. As a result of my early life experience, an increase in the number of siblings has resulted in an unexpected blessing. Sometimes siblings can drive you mad, and other times they can be a refuge. Whether you have a full, half, step, or adopted sibling, the benefits far outweigh the shortcomings.
When it comes to blended families, there are a few things to keep in mind:
More family, more love. Blended families create a greater network of support. More people to scold you when you need it, but also more defenders when it’s called for. It leads to a larger number of relatives which results in more role models, companionship, and care for the entire family unit.
It is OK to come to terms with the reality that there are variances between bonds with blended families. Sometimes it has to do with blood, but other times it may be due to gender and age, and there is nothing wrong with that. Recognizing the value of all bonds leads to a healthier and stronger family.
We are there for each other when it counts — be it in the best of times such as weddings, births, and celebrations, or the worst of times such as in illness and death. Whatever the situation may be, we are there for each other. The bond of a blended family shouldn’t be underestimated, but appreciated.
I’m grateful for my big “Brady Bunch” family. I recognize its value and I can’t imagine my life without it. While my family is blended, it is beautiful. I love all of my brothers and sisters and look forward to spending a lifetime together with them. “Family is like music, some high notes, some low notes, but always a beautiful song.” — Anonymous
Susanna Zambrano is the associate dean for South Yuma County Services and adjunct faculty at Arizona Western College. She can be reached at Susanna.Zambrano@azwestern.edu.