PEN-PRICKS

• The Supreme Court will hear a case about a charter school that refused to enroll too many smart kids for entry in order to achieve social balance. We can all cite recent evidence that intelligence is overrated. Elon Musk just paid $44 billion for Twitter and I got it for free on the App Store.

• Fox News saluted Elon Musk’s commitment to change Twitter to a free-for all. Meanwhile CNN ripped Musk as a laughable attention junkie. If you combined the reactions of the left and right to Musk’s purchase in one headline it’d read The World’s Biggest Clown Buys the World’s Largest Circus.

• The White House noted that Title 42 is no longer needed at the border because COVID is over but insisted that masks are needed on planes because COVID is far from over. I think it highlights the good fortune of the Amish. They’ve never had a problem with COVID, because they don’t watch television.

• The Census Bureau blamed the low U.S. birth rate on millennial men reluctant to commit and get married. As a bachelor Baby Boomer, I’m doing what I can to take up the slack, but it’s an uphill climb. Today I asked Siri why young, millennial women won’t date me, and it activated the front camera.