DNA Magazine

HE GETS HARD FOR THE MONEY

Escorting from every angle.

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WHAT KIND OF MAN BECOMES A SEX PROFESSION­AL? WHAT ARE THE MYTHS AROUND ESCORTING? MEET THE WORKING MEN, THE RETIRED ESCORTS, THE ENTREPRENE­URS, A FAILED RENT BOY, AND A MAN WHO PAID FOR THE TIME OF HIS LIFE. FEATURE BY JESSE ARCHER.

Working in the sex industr y for over a decade, “Jeremy” looks back on the business and confesses everything! The perks and pitfalls, the Greek bricklayer­s, the cake makers and that ver y famous footy player…

DNA: What made you decide to get into escorting and sex work? Jeremy: I was 19, studying at university and the student allowance wasn’t cutting it. I was at a nightclub and an older gent, probably in his early forties, offered to blow me. I politely declined. Then he countered with, “What if I give you a $100?” Two minutes later and I’m in the alley getting what I remember being quite a skilled blow job. Doing sex work from 19 to 30 is a long time. How did it shape who you are today? It honed my ability to engage with people. It also gave me a much more open heart than most of my gay peers at the time. Once you experience that breadth of people, you start to understand the human condition in a much more honest and welcoming way. It also meant I looked beyond the physical for my partners and sexual trysts. I have very broad types and the reason for that is one all escorts need to remember: everyone has something beautiful about them. Find it. Many think of escorting as being all about super hot guys. It’s the package look and not just a pretty face or hot body. By package, I mean a twink, jock, skater, exotic, muscle mary, muscle bear or boy next >>

>> door – that was mine. Looks get you in the door but what keeps you there and gets repeat patronage is personalit­y. What personalit­y traits does it take? Three above all else: excellent communicat­ion skills – you have to know how to carry a conversati­on, even about something you know nothing about. You also have to be a good listener. For many men, this is the only time they feel they can really be themselves. Don’t just hear them, listen to what they are telling you. And you have to be able to be intimate – a comforter. Sex is maybe only 25 per cent. You have to be able to hold someone. Not just a clumsy hug, but hold them with your whole body. Touch is the most important thing these men are probably getting out of the session. What was the craziest thing someone asked you to do? I was once asked to ride a man like a pony around his house yelling “Mush! Mush! Hiya, hiya! Mule!” while I whipped his arse with a riding crop. I felt ridiculous, but I pocketed $400. Did you have difficulti­es getting an erection? I rarely had a problem. On working days I wouldn’t have a wank, so the tank was full and the hormones on standby. If I was tired or it was late, I would pop maybe half a Viagra. What was the most memorable session? I remember this as clear as day. My phone rang on a Tuesday night, which was weird because my ad stated strictly Wednesday to Saturday. The guy started asking the usual questions and then got into an in-depth conversati­on about confidenti­ality and asked if I would sign a legal document. I agreed. I was then given an address, a time and specific instructio­ns: wear overalls. No cologne. Be a little sweaty so do some pushups before coming over. Anyway, I arrived at the home of a very famous rugby league player (no, not Ian Roberts). I was there four hours and it was a dream booking. Nice guy. Great body. Amazing sex. To this day the best kisser I have experience­d. Oh, and a great tipper! In general, what kind of guys hired you? I got everything from a 20-year-old Greek bricklayer who should have been a $10,000 a day model and who could pound me for hours without stopping, to a 65-year-old professor who used to bake things for me. With the professor all we did was chat, but I had to be naked. His baked goods were fantastic, by the way. I’ve never had a better chocolate gateaux! Did you sleep with a lot of “straight” married guys? I would say 50 per cent of my clients were straight married guys. These were men who were hetero-normative in their daily lives. But these were also men who had a homo-active sexuality. They were very good clients who rewarded a good time and respected our confidenti­ality as much as we respected theirs. After all, we knew where they lived! Did Jeremy ever have orgies with other sex workers? Yes. Once was a well-known music personalit­y who hosted a party with approximat­ely 30 guests and 10 workers. We were to socialise, sit on laps, be charming and flirty – lots of kisses and giggles and a little petting. We were also naked. If we were invited into the “play room”, we were to be available. This was the most profession­al orgy I have ever been to. It was like a cocktail party. What about condoms? Could Jeremy be paid enough not to bother? Once, with the profession­al rugby player. And only then because I knew about the rigours of their

We were to socialise, sit on laps, be charming and flirty – lots of kisses and giggles and a little petting. We were also naked. If we were invited into the play room we were to be available. It was the most profession­al orgy I’ve ever been to.

health testing due to the blood bin rules and the inclusion of HIV testing as a matter of course. Otherwise, absolutely not. I was offered $2,000 by one client to raw, but the reality is that I was my own product. Just like a car, I had to keep it in excellent condition otherwise no one would want it. I didn’t use condoms for oral. I usually undressed the client myself so I could give them a once-over looking for crabs, lesions, rashes, unusual bumps or oozes. For them it was part of getting their horny on, but it was more of a safety check for me. How much are drugs involved during tricks? Let’s make the distinctio­n very clear, the sex industry is not prostituti­on. Call a sex worker a prostitute and you are liable to get a very precise response. A secretary sleeping with her boss for a pay rise is prostituti­on. A street worker trading tricks for a fix is prostituti­on. A prostitute sacrifices their normal values to get ahead somehow. Sex workers are in an industry with a culture, an environmen­t of supply and demand with an establishe­d set of rules and behaviours. Drugs are not part of that. Yes it happens, but it is the exception not the rule and for one good reason: a worker cannot allow themselves to be put in a position of vulnerabil­ity. For this same reason, a sex worker should never take a drink that they haven’t watched being prepared. You worked in a brothel, for an agency and for yourself. What are the perks and downfalls to each? A brothel is pack mentality – everyone is competitiv­e. There are no operating costs for the worker, but it is downright hostile at times. As a private operator, I enjoyed working for myself and managing my schedule but the downside was the cost of advertisin­g. Using an agency was my favourite way to work. You have no overhead and someone is doing the screening of clients and promotion for you. The quality of an agency worker is usually very high and my agency would hold barbecues occasional­ly so we could all socialise together. We were allowed to hook up with each other – and we did, but only on our offdays. On our on-days, the tank had to remain full for the client! What was the reason you got out of the business? It was time. I loved it, but it really did impact my social life and my ability to find a relationsh­ip. So I patted “Jeremy” on the bum, thanked him for his service and retired him. What are you doing now? I am an Executive Assistant in a corporate setting. What advice do you have for someone looking into being an escort? Think it through long and hard. There is nothing shameful about being an escort, but it is a very unique world of employment. Know how to communicat­e. Know how to read people. Know the bar is set very high thanks to online porn and the images we can see there. Make sure you occupy a niche that no one else does. An escort is their own product: make it unique. Market it well. Take care of it (testing, et al). Importantl­y, know when it is time to stop. Do you keep in touch with any of your regulars? Absolutely not. When “Jeremy” retired, so did contact. Plus the regulars understood that if they saw me – yes, it’s a small world and they did – that we did not know each other and were to introduce ourselves as normal. That’s the culture and the appropriat­e way to handle it.

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