BMW S 1000 R

THIS MONTH I HAVE MOSTLY BEEN… “Rid­ing like a nut.”

Fast Bikes - - LONGTERMERS -

While last month saw me bum­bling around like Miss Daisy get­ting used to the Beamer, this month the bike hasn’t seen any other set­ting than full on hooli­gan mode. We’re all led to be­lieve and are con­stantly hav­ing it rammed down our throats that ex­cess and over in­dul­gence is bad for us. What a load of crap!

Firstly, I’ll have noth­ing rammed down my throat thank you very much; sec­ondly, rid­ing like a proper head­case all month couldn’t have made me hap­pier. Rag­ging the bike for 1400 miles north of the bor­der in the land of hag­gis and kilts has been awe­some. I like to pack light so throw­ing a tail pack and tank bag on the bike seemed like an easy op­tion. Last minute prep and the Kr­iega US10 tail­pack was a dod­dle to fit, nestling per­fectly on the pas­sen­ger seat, but like a plonker I tried fit­ting my old mag­netic tankbag to the plas­tic tank! After an hour of feck­ing around I fi­nally had the job sussed… A ball ache I could have done with­out. If you’ve got any sug­ges­tions for fu­ture lug­gage op­tions, drop me a line, please.

The jaunt’s ini­tial 300 mile ride up to the bik­ing mecca of Dum­fries and Gal­loway re­ally put me and the bike to the test. Two hours in, a quick fill up at Scotch Cor­ner helped to break the ef­fort­less jour­ney up be­fore smash­ing the fi­nal cou­ple of hours that led us to Mof­fat. De­spite be­ing a naked bike, wind blast was kept to a min­i­mum thanks to the MRA tour­ing screen I’ve re­cently fit­ted, even when the speedo crept deep into triple fig­ures – sorry of­fi­cer. I wouldn’t claim it cut the wind down to a fairy’s fart, but it cer­tainly did an amaz­ing job con­sid­er­ing it’s only a smidge over 300mm tall. The qual­ity and fit is spot on and with next day de­liv­ery from HPS I had noth­ing to grum­ble about, which is a rar­ity for me. Five days of scratch­ing around and gen­er­ally be­hav­ing badly on some of Scot­land’s im­mac­u­late roads high­lighted the ca­pa­bil­i­ties of the Beamer. From the eas­ily changed power modes to the dy­namic damp­ing con­trol sus­pen­sion, ev­ery­thing worked seam­lessly. Our last morn­ing in Scot­land saw us have some san­ity for break­fast but it didn’t last long! Ev­ery day the rid­ing had been men­tal and the jour­ney home was no dif­fer­ent. My only neg­a­tive this month is a vi­bra­tion I’ve be­come more aware of be­tween 6,000-7,000rpm. I just hope it’s not like the spot you no­tice on your mis­sus’ face; the more you try to ig­nore it the worse it seems to get.

Read­ing the man­ual last month put me in good stead for thumb­ing the naughty but­ton oth­er­wise known as TC (trac­tion con­trol). One press of that magic but­ton and I seem to turn into a wannabe ver­sion of Gary Roth­well, pop­ping lit­tle wheel­ies and pulling off dirty fat burnouts. Need­less to say I’ve spanked the back tyre so a set of Dun­lop SportS­mart2Max rub­ber’s head­ing my way, ready for next month’s shenani­gans. Can’t bloody wait!

And there goes an­other tyre! TheMRA screen has made awor­thy­bolt-on. Neil loves a good strap- on (pan­nier).

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