Best & Worst: Crystal Palace
Robert Sutherland, of Crystal Palace fanzine Five Year Plan, on woeful loanees and ill- fitting shorts
XI
BEST: Nigel Martyn, Kenny Sansom, Mamadou Sakho, Jim Cannon, Joel Ward, Geoff Thomas, Mile Jedinak, Jason Puncheon, Wilfried Zaha, Ian Wright, Peter Taylor.
WORST: Steve Mandanda, Zeki Fryers, Neil Ruddock, Valerien Ismael, Jason Crowe, Tom Ince, Jordon Mutch, Edgar Davids ( yes, really!), Jimmy Kebe, Ade Akinbiyi, Patrick Bamford.
PLAYER
B: A toss- up between Zaha [ right] and Wright, but Wilf wins on longevity. It’s been a joy watching him grow into the player he is today.
Kebe. Recommended to Palace by an ex- boss, but did the bare minimum to earn his wages with us.
GAME
B: For the suspense, enormity of the occasion and result, the 2010 draw with Sheffield Wednesday which kept us in the Championship ( and secured our future as a club). We only needed a point, the Owls needed three. With 6,000 fans cheering on the away side, we earned a 2- 2 draw thanks to Alan Lee and Darren Ambrose goals.
W: Palace’s 2016 FA Cup Final defeat to Manchester United at Wembley. We took a deserved lead thanks to Jason Puncheon’s volley, and had to hold on for just 12 minutes to celebrate a first major trophy. Alan Pardew wiggled, and United scored twice. It still hurts.
SEASON
B: Winning promotion in 2004, having started the season so miserably. That was the most remarkable experience as Palace embarked on a fantastic run guided by Iain Dowie, and we finished the season with a delightful play- off final victory over Pardew’s cocky West Ham team in Cardiff.
Suffering relegation the following season was incredibly disappointing. Palace did really well to go up the previous year, and despite Andy Johnson scoring 21 goals, we just couldn’t find enough wins to keep the Premier League dream going.
SIGNING
B: Every side needs a James Mcarthur [ right]: the quiet and unassuming midfielder who does everything, but doesn’t always get noticed. Mcarthur cost Palace £ 7 million and has given us six seasons of excellent displays. Amir Karic. Brought in on loan from Ipswich in March 2001, he looked like someone who’d never played football before. He featured in three matches, returned to Suffolk and then failed to make any further appearances for the Tractor Boys.
GOAL
B: Easy: Andros Townsend’s absolute thunderbastard at the Etihad Stadium in 2018. Not only was it the greatest goal ever scored by any Palace player, but we took all three points in a season where Manchester City won every other home league game.
W: Tony Popovic scored the best worst own goal of all- time at Portsmouth in September 2004. He flicked a right foot at Steve Stone’s cross and managed to loop a beautiful effort into the corner
of the net. Amazing.
CULT HERO
B: Dean Austin [ below]. Recruited by Terry Venables, maligned by everyone. He put in a brilliant performance against Norwich in 1999, scoring a winner which totally changed his career at the club. Still loved. W: John Bostock. He’s one of those players who appeared to have the world at his feet as a teenager, then signed for Tottenham and his career hasn’t amounted to much since. It’s a shame, as we had such high hopes for him at Palace.
MANAGER
B: A tie between Steve Coppell and Roy Hodgson. Both coaches have left their mark on the club and given Palace their most successful spells.
Peter Taylor. We went from being an entertaining counter- attacking side to one that would take 1- 0 leads early on in matches and then defend them – it was so dreary.
HARD MAN
B: Mile Jedinak. Palace’s captain during our most recent promotion, the Aussie enforcer ruled with an iron fist – but he was also a classy leader.
Neil Ruddock. ‘ Razor’ couldn’t wear the shorts he’d been given because he was so overweight, then he played like he was, too. Dreadful.