We’re going to need a bigger boast
I’VE got something in common with three-time world surfing champ Mick Fanning — unfortunately it’s neither surfing ability nor rugged good looks.
We’ve both come face-to-face with a great white shark in South Africa and lived to tell the tale.
It was worldwide news in 2015 when at the Jeffreys Bay tour event he warded off a 4m man-eater with a deft punch before help arrived. And just last week poor Mick was in the headlines again after another close encounter at J Bay.
However, my shark story barely rated a mention in the family newsletter. Because while I too stared into the cold, black eyes of a 4m apex predator it was through the relative safety of a steel cage.
It was still the most frightening experience of my life, but maybe not entirely in the way you’d think. In fact it wasn’t until I was in the cage and a great white banged up against the bars that I felt the calmest I had all day.
As with most stupid ideas this one was born the night before after a few local brews.
When I woke the next morning I wasn’t sure if I’d followed through on my bravado by booking a shark dive or not. I was hoping I dreamt it. I can’t even watch Jaws let alone voluntarily submit myself, my wife and three best friends to living it. But I quickly learnt this nightmare was real and I’d spent a sizeable chunk of the holiday budget committing to it. It was the two-hour drive there that was the most terrifying part of that day. We played out every worstcase scenario imaginable trying to make each other so scared that one of us would pull out, thereby allowing us to all head home for a club sandwich without losing face. By the time we arrived at the boat we were quaking in our wetsuit booties. But it got worse. The cage didn’t fill me with confidence. The bars weren’t nearly as thick as I’d imagined, and the choppy water had my stomach in knots.
The only way to end this mental torture was to get it over with.
So like all heroic husbands I allowed my wife to test the waters first and when she emerged unscathed I had little choice but to jump in.
But when I was submerged in the cage and not being wound up by my friends a feeling of awe came over me and I was able to control my fear and simply marvel at these magnificent creatures who didn’t seem particularly interested in us anyway.
I may not be an Aussie legend like Mick Fanning, but after that trip I’m a legend in my own lunchtime. I’m just glad it wasn’t the shark’s too.