They’re about to jump, and me, too

“BABE, can you come here and take a photo of my hair please?”

That quote is all the proof you need that men are from Mars and women are from Venus.

My fiancee, Holly, was in the other room on Saturday getting herself ready for a wedding.

I was in bed, form guide at my side, settling in for a few races on Derby Day — Christmas Day for punters.

And as they were about to jump in the Group 1 Coolmore Stud Stakes she asked me that question. A photo of your hair? Now? To quote John McEnroe ... “You cannot be serious?!”

I don’t think I’ll ever be able to understand the psyche, maybe that’s why I struggled so much when I was single.

I’m all for admiring freshly done hair and I understand that it’s impossible to see how good it looks when all the business of the new do is out the back.

But there is a sense of timing with females that never ceases to amaze me.

They just have this amazing habit of asking for the most ridiculous things at the worst times. And on big days like Derby Day, a man just needs to be left alone ... especially if he is not winning. For what it’s worth, the race was as good as the hairstyle. Simply awesome. Merchant Navy came storming home to claim the race in the last few strides. I have managed to avoid being annoyed by ridiculous questions so far this spring. I’ve been at the racetrack for the Caulfield Guineas, Caulfield Cup and the Cox Plate. The Melbourne Cup and the VRC Oaks are on work days, so that will be fine, too. So I am now really looking forward to what happens on Stakes day.

Surely there is a question brewing at the back of Holly’s mind she could ask me as they are being put into the barriers for the feature race.

Take the bins out? Fix the six million pillows on the bed? Do the dishes?

If I was to frame a market, they would be the favourites for the Group 1 Annoy Ryan At The Worst Possible Time Cup.

But there are plenty of roughies in the field, too.

Maybe some loud vacuuming followed by the obligatory knock out the TV cord. Asking me to put away my ironed clothes is a chance.

It’s hard to see taking a photo of hair making it back-toback victories, but if it does then there will be hell to pay!