Thrills, spills and Phil
JUST when you thought things couldn’t get much worse on our political landscape, a few selfinterested clowns masquerading as government ministers who claim to have the best interests of their constituents at heart, prove yet again that history can be a great guide to the future (unfortunately). And that public figures who say they have learnt from their own and their party’s mistakes, or the opposition party’s mistakes, are generally full of manure.
But don’t let it get you down. Football is far more important than politics and there are far worse things that living under an ineffective government (again).
Look on the bright side. Consider the glass half-full and pull your socks up, because, just in case you’d forgotten:
PHIL Collins is coming back to tour Australia. And Richmond is potentially just a few weeks away from winning back-to-back AFL premierships.
Armageddon.
RICHMOND is just weeks away from winning back-to-back premierships and imagine if that happened with Phil Collins being the pre-game, halftime and postgame “entertainment”. Double armageddon. OR: Let’s say you’ve scored a free corporate ticket to the AFL Grand Final and you’re watching Richmond win back-to-back premierships, with Phil Collins as halftime and post-match entertainment and you’ve lost your earplugs but it’s not so bad because you’re not paying for drinks. But, you end up sitting next to Peter Dutton and have to explain the game to him because he is from Queensland and has no clue and all he wants to talk about is a royal commission into petrol prices (instead of beer prices at AFL venues) while you’re trying to watch the footy and enjoy the hospitality and when you ask him why that inquiry has never been a priority for him when he had no profile he can’t answer and instead asks if you can fetch him a canape and another glass of Penfolds Grange.
OR: You wake up the day after the GF to discover your club has signed Brendon Goddard to a one-year deal when you’re already grumpy from sitting next to Dutton and Richmond won back-to-back flags and that made you leave the GF sooner than you anticipated so you could get the early train home and when you told Peter Dutton why you had to shoot through like a Bondi tram he said “what is a train or a tram?’’
OR: After trying 74 times to win AFL Grand Final tickets in a radio station promo you finally get through only to be told you’re the second caller and the runnerup gets two tickets to see Phil Collins instead.
Or, EVEN WORSE, you come third in the same competition and win FOUR TICKETS to see the same bloke.
See? It could be MUCH WORSE.