Accidents will (hilariously) happen

I’VE always been the type of person that gets some enjoyment out of other people’s misfortune.

Now, I’m not talking about really serious things … you know, like losing houses or jobs and stuff like that.

It’s the harmless stuff that I really, really love — the ones that cause embarrassment, or minor injury.

I’ll never forget the day that I was driving home from uni and I cruised by this kid on his scooter. He looked about nine or 10. The youngster looked at me as I turned the corner, deciding to see if he could keep up with the car.

We ‘drag-raced’ at a snail’s pace up Watsons Rd in Newcomb, his little legs kicking back and pushing him as fast as he could. And then he hit a rock. BANG, CRASH, SMASH. Little Johnny was on his face as his scooter swung over the top of his legs, which were flying through the air. I stopped. Well, not to check and see if Little Johnny was OK, but be- cause I was laughing so hard I started crying and couldn’t see where I was going. I don’t know why, but it’s that story that always sticks out in my mind when I think of misfortune. It happened a good 10 years ago now. Little Johnny probably has a kid of his own and I highly doubt he remembers the time he tried to drag a Commodore and ate concrete. But I do and I always will. It makes me wonder if there is someone, somewhere that remembers something stupid that I’ve done over my near-30 years on this planet? Are they sitting down having a beer with a mate on a Saturday night recalling a story of stupidity that I’ve done?

I’ve got no doubt that there would be lots of material floating around.

I’ve been locked out of the house in my jocks and had to sit on the front door step during school pick-up time while I waited for someone to drop over the spare key.

I’ve split the arse out of my shorts at the gym midway through a squat.

I’ve had a back spasm in the middle of Moorabool St at 3am as I was shuffling home from Home House with kebab in hand.

I’d like to think I’ve made an impact on someone’s life for the better, given them a moment they can look back on an chuckle when they’re feeling a bit down. I hope I’m someone else’s Little Johnny!