Brow-beaten over follicle challenges

IF eyes are the windows to one’s soul, then surely the eyebrows must be the frames which enhance the face and give it balance.

Or so the beauty experts say, and I see no reason to doubt them.

And it was whether to replace my mangy exhibits with a set of perfectly tattooed eyebrows that prompted some serious consideration.

Now to be honest, even as a kid my eyebrows annoyed me. In fact by age 16, my teenage self had decided I was dead ugly, having red hair, freckles and worst of all, thick blonde eyebrows.

So I decided to address the situation.

Enter Dad’s super beaut Gillette safety razor which I began to use, carefully shaving my eyebrows down from above to turn them from hedgerows into something as slim as a nun’s patience.

What I did not anticipate however, was that once I started this procedure I had to keep going.

That the hair would grow back thicker and faster as my eyebrows began to travel south towards Bass Strait, steadily closing in on my eye sockets. And it was either shave them each morning or have a field of stubble hovering above each eye by lunchtime.

Yes they grew that fast.

While Dad puzzled as to why his razor blades always seemed blunt when he went to use them, I was at least happy in the fact my eyebrows had slimmed considerably.

Oddly enough no one else seemed to notice.

Couple of years on, after being caught out and told in no uncertain terms to cease forthwith, I started plucking them, which I must say required better eyesight, unlimited patience and a strong pain threshold, none of which I had.

Then a light bulb moment, I’d get them waxed.

Now if anything is ever going to bring tears to your eyes it is getting waxed.

I left my first and only session effectively denuded but with the surrounding areas glowing bright enough to light up the night sky and my face fixed in a paralysis of pain.

There had to be another way.

So, I grew a fringe.

Eventually, over the years, I overcame my eyebrow paranoia and, in hindsight, they were probably never as ugly as they seemed anyway.

In more recent years however I noticed a complete reversal in that, on closer inspection, they looked for all the world like the rats had been chewing on them.

They were getting thinner. My beloved hairdresser, always awash with brilliant ideas, suggested I get them tattooed.

This conjured up all kinds of images.

Would they just look like two large caterpillars crawling across my dial?

Would they be too dark, too thick?

And I certainly wouldn’t want them to look as though they’d been drawn on with a texta.

Now I know a few ladies who have had their eyebrows tattooed and they swear by it. And they look good. But it took a 2020 Christmas beauty treatment voucher to kick start me into action.

KAREN MATTHEWS let’s face it, there’s no point getting the windscreen wipers working if the engine’s shot, right?

A trial brow tint was done as a test run. But even with the lightest tint, I still couldn’t get used to it and couldn’t wait for them to fade.

Now, more than 12 months on, still undecided and with the voucher only half used, question is, will I go back and give it a serious go or not? Or will I instead forget about eyebrows altogether and concentrate on more relevant stuff like maintaining a healthy lifestyle and staying fit?

Might sound a bit boring but let’s face it, there’s no point getting the windscreen wipers working if the engine’s shot, right?

Right! So that’s that sorted then. And oh yes, Happy New Year to all.

KIDS country week canned (GA 18/12). So, so sad to read this carnival for the kids canned, as a ex junior cricketer who lived for this carnival, bringing kids all together to play this wonderful game. So sad no one would step up to keep this going. Like most clubs these days, nobody prepared to put their hand up.

Paul Turner, Newcomb, ex Churches player

WOULD like to thank Lara CFA who came out to rescue my niece’s cat who was stuck down a drain. Very appreciative of their quick attendance. We all want to thank you guys for a job well done.

Grateful

YET once again the carrot of the Convention Centre is dangled before our eyes (GA 24/12). With concept pictures this time.

Ho Hum

ARTICLE in Geelong Addy 21/12 Police catching speeders, had to laugh … Well no not really! It’s serious. Good on the police for catching speeders But as a constant traveller over the Breakwater

Bridge where the speed limit is 40km in places, maybe they should follow the rules too. I travel at the correct speed and had cars go past me with the police following them and not in pursuit. Constantly cars fly up behind me. Follow the speed limits. Allow extra time. Slow down.

Jo, Grovedale

SITTING in my car near the pedestrian crossing in Ryrie St at the intersection with James St. In 30 minutes I have seen more than a dozen people cross against the red “don’t cross’ signal. Worst of all are the few adults taking children across. Pedestrian safety right out the window. How do we expect to reduce pedestrian fatalities and injuries with so many people not following the basic rules of safety?

Len, Hamlyn Heights

ALAN Barron, if you want to everything you mention GET VACCINATED. It’s not rocket science.

Les Menzies, Ocean Grove

WOULD it be possible to deport immediately, a group of males from England, who fraudulently entered this country pretending to be professional first class cricketers? Geoff Barnes, Leopold

WITH high home prices and rates going up 1.75% how do you expect the average person to afford this? When wages and inflation isn’t on par and household budgets are already tight? Those that are vax-free need to receive confirmation on how much they get back or don’t need to pay because of all the facilities that they are no longer allowed to use — the services and facilities that are subsidised by the ratepayers. Vax-free ratepayers can no longer enjoy many things. This sum needs to be calculated and subtracted because the choice has been removed from them. They didn’t change, we as society did, so why make them pay for your personal choice to get vaxxed then lock them out and still pay for facilities that they can no longer access?

Amanda, Curlewis