ANDREW ‘BEEF’ JOHNSTON

WHAT’S the nearest you’ve come to death? Doing a bungee jump. I was keen, but it was a lot scarier than I thought it was going to be. I watched a few people jump off with the ‘three, two, one’ countdown and a few people didn’t go. I thought ‘what a wimp’, but when I got up there, I looked down and it was a bit different. I had to just go before he got to ‘one’. I’m not sure if I’d do it again. What superpower would you have and why? What’s the thing where you can travel from place to place? Teleportation. That would be perfect for getting around. When and where would you go if you could time travel? The Wild West in America. I’d really like to see what it was like. I think it’d be pretty mad with the frontier towns, the saloon bars and the shoot outs. Do you think you’d be quite quick on the draw? Hell no (laughs). Where’s your dream holiday destination? It would have to be Jamaica because I’ve got a bit of heritage there. I can go and see family and the beaches and food are amazing. It’s just a good time, man. And the nightlife is great. Have you got some dancehall moves? Yeah, man. I like the thunder clap (Google it if you don’t know). How did the beard come about? It got a bit long a few years ago and a few of the players and caddies gave me some stick for it so I said I’d grow it over Christmas. I grew to like it and that was it. Have you got any hidden talents? I’m good at getting people drunk and missing flights (laughs). I always seem to make my flights, but my caddie missed one recently after we’d been enjoying ourselves. What’s your favourite food? BBQ food. It’s got to be brisket, cooked really well and timed to perfection. It’s not easy to cook because it can take eight or nine hours and there’s a small timeframe for getting it spot on. What do you miss most when you’re away from home? North Middlesex Golf Club, without a doubt. I’ve got loads of good mates up there and I can go and hang out with them and have a good time. I’m always up there when I’m back home. How important is it to stay grounded and see your mates when you’re not on tour? Massively. I’m always looking forward to going there so it’s not even about staying grounded, it’s just a thing that I always want to do. What’s your drink of choice? It has to be a pint. And literally everything later in the evening. What’s been your most embarrassing non-golfing moment? I had one not too long ago at my golf club. I walked into the bar and saw my friend stood at the bar so slapped him on the ass. Then I turned around and my friend was actually on the other side and it was a complete stranger I’d just slapped. He was very confused! I was like ‘I’m so sorry, mate. Now I’ve slapped your ass I might as well buy you a drink’. What’s been your proudest non-golfing moment? I don’t know, there haven’t been many. I guess when I bought my flat because I was proud to get on the property ladder and it shows that things have been going well. Who would play you in the movie of your life? Are we going on who I like or looks? I’m going to have to say Will Ferrell and then to pull off the looks John C. Reilly or Zach Galifianakis from The Hangover.

I SAW MY FRIEND AT THE BAR SO I SLAPPED HIM ON THE ASS ... THEN I TURNED AROUND AND HE WAS ON THE OTHER SIDE!