PURPOSE, PASSION AND PERFORMANCE

Must we choose between a purpose driven life or a performance driven life?

Call it coincidence. It happened twice. Discussions on Purpose and Passion in two very different settings and yet, it was more than serendipitous. It was time to revisit something that I know, I think we all know and yet, struggle with the tension that it presents in our lives.

Yesterday was ‘about me’ time. I don’t do this enough but I’m learning to do it more. Part of my quest is to be available to experiences that give me life. It took me some time to realize that as much as I poured into others through the many roles I play, I decided that I needed some time with some women that bring me joy. In our many conversations throughout the day, we spoke about our personal, professional and philosophical lives. I love these women because they allow me to be

my multi-faceted self without any apologies. In our dialogue, we began to discuss the dualism that exists in all of us. There is this tension that tears at each of us daily. Like the Cherokee Indian story of the two wolves inside of us, the one we feed the most is the one that wins. For many of us, this tension of living our purpose can become distorted in a society that is accomplishment based.

Today, I taught a class of entrepreneurs who shared their stories. It is more than developing a wonderful product, it is about the why. It is to accept and understand the passion that drives us. It is also critical to understand that this passion gives us purpose. Once again, I was faced with this topic and as much as I wanted to choose one over the other, I had to really wrestle with my thinking and reflect.

Absolutes are abundant in our society. We are forced to choose between the two. Is it possible to accept both/and versus either/or? Is it possible to have a purpose driven life that empowers us to live a life of fulfilment? Can we have a purpose driven life that is based on our core values and belief systems, that gives us meaning? And is the opposite true as well? Is it possible to have a performance driven life that is filled with purpose, passion and persistence to achieve? If I have great ideas that are never realized, that is a loss.

If we are solely focused on being performance driven, we miss out. I would also argue that if we focus on purpose solely without having direction and a plan, we also miss out. Once again, the dualism is present and is it possible to have both, with authenticity, balance and focus? As women and as leaders who are often pulled in a million directions, how can we daily create goals that don’t just get checked off a list but also lead us to walking in the fullness of who we are, created and designed to be?

Have I had any resolution in this ongoing dialogue? More than anything, it affirmed for me the value of reflection. As leaders, we must take the time to think, to wrestle with those things that cause us discomfort or leave us without answers. We have to ask, ‘why does this bother me or stir up my triggers’? I think it has also created the space for me to realize that daily we encounter dualisms and instead of accepting the tension, we dismiss it for the sake of relief—one more thing to say we’ve completed or that we feel ‘right’ about it because two opposites mean that one is incorrect. We have to ask the hard questions not only of others but of ourselves. We have to ask which life are we feeding more and are we getting the results we want from either?

The passion that drives us is also the passion that gives us purpose. Must we choose between a purpose driven life based on our core values and belief systems OR a performance driven life filled with purpose, passion and persistence to achieve?

Dr Froswa Booker-Drew is an author of two workbooks for women, Rules of Engagement: Making Connections Last and Ready for a Revolution: 30 Days to Jolt Your Life. She has a PhD in Leadership and Change from Antioch University and has more than twenty years in non-profit management, education and community development as a leader, consultant, speaker and trainer. For more information on Froswa visit her website.