WOUNDS AS WINDOWS
Inner wounds are like windows where healing can occur
“DON’T TURN KEEP YOUR HEAD. BANDAGED PLACE. LOOKING AT THE LIGHT THAT’S WHERE THE ENTERS YOU. DON’T BELIEVE MOMENT AND FOR A HEALING THAT YOU ARE YOURSELF.” -RUMI
Rumi wrote these wonderfully insightful lines in the middle of the 13th century. They were healing then and if applied with courage and insight today, will be as healing to all of us.
The fact is we have all been wounded, many of us more than once. Each wound has done its damage to our minds, our hearts, our souls and our bodies. None of us are exempt. Often the wound does not heal or close and we carry it daily and feel its effects in our self-esteem, our relationships and our aliveness.
Over the last four decades, I have seen evidence of how deeply we can be affected by our wounds and through this process, I have learned to never compare one individual’s difficulties to another. We each have our journey and I truly cannot say that one is easier or more difficult than another. Therefore, I treat each individual and her or his pain with the same respect and compassion. Healing a wound is hard whatever its source. Yet, it is my experience that wounds (my own and other’s) can heal and that lives can become more whole and aliveness can blossom in the midst of what seemed bottomless hardship and pain.
One of the most healing potions that can be applied to an open wound, is the guidance that Rumi offers us in the brief poem quoted above. Here it is again in sentence form:
“Don’t turn your head. Keep looking at the bandaged place. That’s where the Light enters you. And don’t believe for a moment that you are healing yourself.”
His first sentence directs us to find courage and to look ‘face on’ at the place of pain. Most of us want to look away when our deepest pain surfaces and this very wise man knows that. He knows courage is required. He also knows that refusal to look means the wound will not heal. But then he offers an amazing insight. “That is where the
Light enters you.” Who could imagine that Light (divine blessing, inspiration, healing, transformative change), could actually enter us through something that we have always seen as a bad, hurtful, negative experience? Only a spiritual master could have that vision but we can share in his vision if we trust even a little, if we take the chance to look and hold our fear at bay until we see the Light.
I have been wounded many times in my life. Some wounds were at the hands of others and some by my own. Some were superficial and some wounded to the bone. They shaped me unmercifully in a thousand ways and I spent many years attempting to recover and recoup. However, nothing has been more healing than the advice Rumi offered me. His wisdom, applied consistently and without hesitation, has given me the ability to literally change the value of every wound I ever received, from negative and destructive, to a Source of Light that brings a blessing of enormous value. I want each person reading this lesson to have that same experience. I want Rumi’s truth to become yours in the same way that it has become mine.
HOW CAN THAT HAPPEN? YOU WILL HAVE TO DO THE FOLLOWING:
1. Name your wound. Naming a wound is a way of validating that it exists and that it is real.
2. Name and describe how this wound has affected you. The more detail you provide the more healing can occur.
3. Name and describe how this wound has affected others in your life. The more detail the better.
4. Find the courage to put your pain, hurt, anger, resentment, rage aside (even if they are totally justified) and look at your wound until you see Light in it. Light will bring
you a new perspective. It will give you the ability to see what gifts (yes, a strong word to apply to your worst wounds), this wound has brought you.
5. Finally, share your insights with someone you trust.
Dr Matthew Anderson has a Doctor of Ministry specialising in counselling. He has extensive training and experience in Gestalt and Jungian Psychology and has helped many people successfully navigate relationship issues. Dr Anderson has a best-selling book, ‘The Resurrection of Romance’ and he may be contacted via his website.