WOUNDS AS WIN­DOWS

In­ner wounds are like win­dows where heal­ing can oc­cur

Great Health Guide - - CONTENTS - Dr Matthew An­der­son

“DON’T TURN KEEP YOUR HEAD. BAN­DAGED PLACE. LOOK­ING AT THE LIGHT THAT’S WHERE THE EN­TERS YOU. DON’T BE­LIEVE MO­MENT AND FOR A HEAL­ING THAT YOU ARE YOUR­SELF.” -RUMI

Rumi wrote these won­der­fully in­sight­ful lines in the mid­dle of the 13th cen­tury. They were heal­ing then and if ap­plied with courage and in­sight to­day, will be as heal­ing to all of us.

The fact is we have all been wounded, many of us more than once. Each wound has done its dam­age to our minds, our hearts, our souls and our bod­ies. None of us are ex­empt. Of­ten the wound does not heal or close and we carry it daily and feel its ef­fects in our self-es­teem, our re­la­tion­ships and our alive­ness.

Over the last four decades, I have seen ev­i­dence of how deeply we can be af­fected by our wounds and through this process, I have learned to never com­pare one in­di­vid­ual’s dif­fi­cul­ties to an­other. We each have our jour­ney and I truly can­not say that one is eas­ier or more dif­fi­cult than an­other. There­fore, I treat each in­di­vid­ual and her or his pain with the same re­spect and com­pas­sion. Heal­ing a wound is hard what­ever its source. Yet, it is my ex­pe­ri­ence that wounds (my own and other’s) can heal and that lives can be­come more whole and alive­ness can blos­som in the midst of what seemed bot­tom­less hard­ship and pain.

One of the most heal­ing po­tions that can be ap­plied to an open wound, is the guid­ance that Rumi of­fers us in the brief poem quoted above. Here it is again in sen­tence form:

“Don’t turn your head. Keep look­ing at the ban­daged place. That’s where the Light en­ters you. And don’t be­lieve for a mo­ment that you are heal­ing your­self.”

His first sen­tence di­rects us to find courage and to look ‘face on’ at the place of pain. Most of us want to look away when our deep­est pain sur­faces and this very wise man knows that. He knows courage is re­quired. He also knows that re­fusal to look means the wound will not heal. But then he of­fers an amaz­ing in­sight. “That is where the

Light en­ters you.” Who could imag­ine that Light (divine bless­ing, in­spi­ra­tion, heal­ing, trans­for­ma­tive change), could ac­tu­ally en­ter us through some­thing that we have al­ways seen as a bad, hurt­ful, neg­a­tive ex­pe­ri­ence? Only a spir­i­tual mas­ter could have that vi­sion but we can share in his vi­sion if we trust even a lit­tle, if we take the chance to look and hold our fear at bay un­til we see the Light.

I have been wounded many times in my life. Some wounds were at the hands of oth­ers and some by my own. Some were su­per­fi­cial and some wounded to the bone. They shaped me un­mer­ci­fully in a thou­sand ways and I spent many years at­tempt­ing to re­cover and re­coup. How­ever, noth­ing has been more heal­ing than the ad­vice Rumi of­fered me. His wis­dom, ap­plied con­sis­tently and with­out hes­i­ta­tion, has given me the abil­ity to lit­er­ally change the value of ev­ery wound I ever re­ceived, from neg­a­tive and de­struc­tive, to a Source of Light that brings a bless­ing of enor­mous value. I want each per­son read­ing this les­son to have that same ex­pe­ri­ence. I want Rumi’s truth to be­come yours in the same way that it has be­come mine.

HOW CAN THAT HAP­PEN? YOU WILL HAVE TO DO THE FOL­LOW­ING:

1. Name your wound. Nam­ing a wound is a way of val­i­dat­ing that it ex­ists and that it is real.

2. Name and de­scribe how this wound has af­fected you. The more de­tail you pro­vide the more heal­ing can oc­cur.

3. Name and de­scribe how this wound has af­fected oth­ers in your life. The more de­tail the bet­ter.

4. Find the courage to put your pain, hurt, anger, re­sent­ment, rage aside (even if they are to­tally jus­ti­fied) and look at your wound un­til you see Light in it. Light will bring

you a new per­spec­tive. It will give you the abil­ity to see what gifts (yes, a strong word to ap­ply to your worst wounds), this wound has brought you.

5. Fi­nally, share your in­sights with some­one you trust.

Dr Matthew An­der­son has a Doc­tor of Min­istry spe­cial­is­ing in coun­selling. He has ex­ten­sive train­ing and ex­pe­ri­ence in Gestalt and Jun­gian Psy­chol­ogy and has helped many peo­ple suc­cess­fully nav­i­gate re­la­tion­ship is­sues. Dr An­der­son has a best-sell­ing book, ‘The Res­ur­rec­tion of Ro­mance’ and he may be con­tacted via his web­site.

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