The brides wore white
Gay couple couldn’t wait for law to change – so wed anyway
CASS and Mary Macwell have already had their dream wedding, but that hasn’t made them any less passionate about seeing same-sex marriage legalised in Australia or any less frustrated about the quality of the debate which they say sank to a new low this week.
The Burnie lesbian couple were particularly incensed by the comments of Senator Eric Abetz who claimed most Australians don’t view marriage equality as a priority and Senator Barnaby Joyce who said if same-sex marriage was legalised it could damage cattle trade with Asia.
“Ridiculous comments like these, and the actions of the Canberra couple who threatened to divorce if marriage equality was introduced, are just so unhelpful to the debate and amount to nothing more than scaremongering,’’ Mary said.
“Why should people like that be able to have any bearing on what we do with our lives?’’
Cass said Senator Abetz was wrong to say most Australians didn’t see marriage equality as a priority but agreed with his assertion that national security, health and jobs were more important issues.
“Marriage equality is so quick and easy to fix so politicians should just get on and do it and then they can concentrate on the other issues.’’
The Macwells decided to marry three years ago but held off until April in the hope marriage equality would be introduced.
“After the last federal election we realised it wouldn’t happen any time soon and decided ‘stuff it’ we’ll just get married anyway,’’ Cass said.
And so, surrounded by their family and friends, Cass (nee Gladwell) and Mary (nee Maclean) “married’’ at Boat Harbour Beach on April 11. Although it is not legally recognised, the couple were determined to have a classic Tasmanian rural wedding celebration and describe their big day as “completely normal’’.
“Our fathers walked us to the celebrant, we had bridesmaids and a bridesman, ring bearers and a rainbow-tiered wedding cake,’’ Mary said.
“We danced the night away at our reception in a rural hall, we both threw bouquets and everyone cried — it was just like everyone else’s weddings, it was beautiful and a fairytale moment for us.’’
Cass, a museum community engagement officer, and Mary, a primary school teacher, like many same-sex couples considered travelling overseas to legally marry.
“But we wanted to be able to have our wedding with all of our family and friends around and it wasn’t possible to fly everyone to New Zealand or wherever,’’ Mary said.
“So although we couldn’t have a legal wedding in Tasmania we wanted a ceremony to show all our family and friends we are committed to each other forever.’’
In lieu of a marriage certificate the couple signed a certificate of commitment, registered their significant relationship under the Relationships Act and announced at their wedding they were both legally changing their surnames.
The Macwells said they would legally marry when marriage equality was finally introduced but would do it privately.
“Being legally married is still very important to us because we want to have children and have that legal security for them,’’ Mary said.
“We want the right to be like everyone else and be able to handle our wills, our taxation and our lives like every other married couple does.’’ Mary said she believed marriage equality was inevitable.
“Throughout history there have been so many times when there have been divisive social issues — interracial marriage is a good example — where people look back and can’t believe there was ever a debate about it,’’ Mary said.
“I just hope we will be looking back in 10 to 20 years and wondering how we could have ever thought it was right to stop people who love each other from marrying.’’