Fright night on the couch
MOVIE REVIEWS
HALLOWEEN-INSPIRED LOOK AT SOME TOP SPINE-CHILLERS
With Halloween now a haunting shimmer on the near horizon, it’s time to go into training to handle all things spooky, scary and jolty. LEIGH PAATSCH hits the streaming platforms in search of a dozen demented delights designed to distress …
FREAKY (MA15+) BINGE, FOXTEL, AMAZON
Enjoyable horror flick, cleverly blending a body-swapping Freaky Friday and a body-chopping Friday the 13th. This is the strange case of serial killer The Blissfield Butcher (Vince Vaughn), now housed within a meek, mild young student named Millie (Kathryn Newton). Once the changeover is in play, both actors have a field day. Newton’s transformation from wallflower to wacko is both chillingly convincing and archly amusing. Same goes for Vaughn’s skilled work heading in the opposite direction.
WRONG TURN (MA15+) BINGE, FOXTEL
As was the case with the 2003 hillbilly horror hit Wrong Turn, there is a gaggle of fresh-faced young fools terrorised by woodlands yokels living off the grid. However, the villains who will be tormenting disoriented yuppies are a little different to the dentally challenged folks in denim overalls who usually pop up in this kind of movie. Get set to say hello to The Foundation, an underground society who have been secretly evolving in spite of the modern world for a number of centuries. Starring Matthew Modine, Charlotte Vega.
IT FOLLOWS (MA15+) FOXTEL OR RENT
Rule 101 of sex in horror movies: do it, and you’re doomed. This hauntingly uncomfortable American chiller adds a number of clever clauses to this time-honoured statute. Sleep with the wrong person, and you will come down with a curse that gets you your very own paranormal stalker. Most shivers are earned with uncharacteristic subtlety and restraint for the genre, and the dreamlike tone of the storytelling wields a strangely seductive allure. A hidden gem well worth tracking down.
OLD (M) PREMIUM RENTAL
An intriguingly bizarre thriller from that notoriously odd filmmaker M. Night Shyamalan (The Sixth Sense, Split). At an exclusive resort, a select group of guests is taken to a private beach. As the day unfolds, the holiday-makers discover they are all rapidly ageing. Little kids suddenly become teenagers. Their parents are now pensioners. Anyone above 50 is unlikely to be alive by sunset. For all its crazy, contradictory logic, the target aimed for here is hit with icky, creepy precision.
YOU’RE NEXT (MA15+) ABC IVIEW OR RENT
Might be a good idea to check the locks, and bolt the windows. Then check them again. Why? Because time in this craftily compelling horror flick has stopped at homeinvasion o’clock. What’s more, there are these three masked dudes just outside the front door of the remote country mansion where you will be spending the duration of the movie. So what’s with the bows and arrows, razor wire and that gizmo that jams all mobilephone coverage, fellas? Best not ask. Effective second-tier spookery, perfect for those after a quick jolt. Stars Shari Vinson.
TILL DEATH (MA15+) NETFLIX
This shrill thriller has the rare knack of being able to both unsettle and amuse at the same time. The premise immediately gets you in. Megan Fox plays a woman who has woken up to discover she has been handcuffed to her recently deceased husband. If that isn’t enough of a shock to her system, the couple’s house is about to play host to some very unwelcome visitors. The more preposterous the twists and turns become, the more punches (and punchlines) are packed.
DON’T BREATHE (M) AMAZON OR RENT
One rundown house. Three young amateur burglars. A loner who does not take kindly to uninvited visitors. A huge pile of cash. In the wrong hands, this would make for 30 minutes of must-see movie at most. The rest would be filler, and worse. Not this time. The running battle of wits and deployment of desperate measures depicted here is staged with nimble speed and nerve-shredding efficiency. You will stagger away from this ordeal both intimidated and impressed. Warning: stay right away from a recently released inferior sequel.
A QUIET PLACE PT 2 (M) RENT ONLY
If you must try a sequel, this superb follow-up is the best way to go. As before, what remains of humanity must abide by the one rule: make the slightest noise, and you will die the swiftest death. With father Lee now gone, mother Evelyn (Emily Blunt), son Marcus (Noah Jupe), daughter Regan (Millicent Simmonds) and Evelyn’s newborn baby are forced to leave their home in search of a safer haven.
ROGUE (MA15+) SBS ON DEMAND, NETFLIX
A tourist boat overturns in a Northern Territory river. Night falls. The tide rises. Guess who, or what, is feeling hungry? If you must see at least one killer croc movie before you die, it may as well be this polished little Australian schlocker from the director of Wolf Creek. Nothing sensational, but plenty of scary fun. Stars Radha Mitchell, Michael Vartan.
THE CRAFT: LEGACY (M) AMAZON, FOXTEL
Back in the 1990s, it didn’t take long for the original version of The Craft to assume its rightful mantle as a cult classic. That movie’s core concept of four teens using malevolent magic to spring-clean the grubby community around them hasn’t altered too much here. Cailee Spaeny stars as Lily, dragged to a new town by a clueless mother (Michelle Monaghan). Fitting in proves problematic until Lily falls in with a trio of wannabe witches (Gideon Adlon, Lovie Simone and Zoey Luna) with a hidden supernatural skill set.
ESCAPE ROOM (M) NETFLIX
A random group of strangers agree to navigate a housebound maze. The first to emerge gets $10,000 cash. And what of the others? Well, it is no spoiler to record that for some contestants, the game may be over before they ever get near that one door to freedom. The real star of the show is the changing environment in which they are stuck, which can replicate anything from the inside of an oven to an open-air snowstorm.
THE INVISIBLE MAN (MA15+) NETFLIX, BINGE, FOXTEL
Elisabeth Moss plays Cecilia, a former architect whose life has been demolished and redesigned by a controlling, conniving and supposedly dead spouse. Though the movie can stretch credibility beyond breaking point, a fearless, up-foranything performance by Moss prevents everything from snapping. Some commentary by stealth on toxic relationships raises the stakes and collects handsomely.