PEOPLE DEAL WITH MARRIAGE BREAK-UPS IN STRANGE WAYS. BE ALERT OF SOME THINGS, BUT, NOT ALARMED, SAYS NENE

Q

My cousin from Canada, who is 26, got married quite young and recently split from her husband. To help her get over the marriage breakdown, she came on holiday to Australia and my husband and I took her out for an evening. I didn’t know her well so I was a bit shocked when she kept tipping back the drinks and started flirting with my husband which really upset me. I will be seeing her again in a couple of months at a family gathering and I’m nervous she’ll hit on my husband again. Should I call her to talk about it before the event? MIRANDA, VIA EMAIL.

A

The dreaded drink may have taken control when you took her out. Some people make such fools of themselves when they’ve had too much alcohol. You will meet in a couple of months and it’s up to your husband to be aware that the flirty cousin could come on strong again. He needs to give her the cold shoulder and you need not to be worried. Keep her at arm’s length and, should she have too much to drink, let’s hope she hits on another member of the family. She is recovering from a broken marriage and may be drowning her sorrows in alcohol. I’m sure you have faith in your husband not to succumb to her playful approach. It would be unwise to call her to talk about her behaviour. The call could be awkward. She may not even remember she was flirting.

Q My sister-in-law is quite stylish and I find it hard to buy presents for her. I spend a lot of time shopping around trying to find things that would suit her, but she even returned one gift by post saying she’d prefer a different style and, on another occasion, she

made really scathing comments. Shall I give up sending her presents? ROWENA, VIA EMAIL.

A

She may be stylish but she is a rude woman. She doesn’t deserve a present but don’t stoop to her bad breeding. I know it’s not personal, but you could send her a gift voucher for her favourite shop. Or be honest, tell her you want her to buy something she will like and ask her for some suggestions. Perhaps you could get her a voucher at a spa – for a manicure, pedicure and a facial. From the sound of her, I doubt whatever you buy would make her happy. But don’t give up. Two wrongs certainly don’t make a right.

Q

A couple of months ago I moved to a new house and, shortly after, met one of my neighbours from a few doors down, who is delightful. I run into her quite regularly, but the embarrassing thing is, I can’t remember her name Should I just fess up and admit I’ve forgotten it? KARLIE, VIA EMAIL.

A I’m a shocker with names and have a habit of calling everyone darling. Not good enough. And what’s worse, is I forget all the names of the people I meet in the dog park but know all the dogs names! Fess up. Make light of the comment – tell her you are hopeless with names and have been in a tizz since moving house and have become quite forgetful. You say she is delightful, so then I’m sure she will understand. Make sure you say her name over and over again so that when you next meet you can call her by her rightful name.