ALLISON DUBOIS

YOU HOLD THE KEY TO YOUR FUTURE, SO MAKE THE MOST OF IT A A

Q

My father has been diagnosed with cancer and it is terminal. My one hope is that his father will be waiting for him on the other side. He passed away when my father was a young boy. We are devastated and hope for the best.

Dizee, via email.

A

Dizee, I’m so sorry, cancer is a terrible disease. I have no doubt that your grandfather will be waiting for your dad when he crosses over. Your grandfather has been waiting a long time to hold his boy again.

When your dad passes he will be restored – he will revert to a younger age and be full of life and love. I often bring people through who had cancer, and they seem to feel that they beat the cancer because it couldn’t kill their spirit.

I know all this is a small consolation, since you still have to endure watching your father struggle in the living world, but please know that even after physical death our loved ones remain part of our lives.

QI divorced my childhood sweetheart after 37 years together. I felt unappreciated and not respected. We both now have a lot of animosity towards each other. We have both moved on with new partners – mine is a wonderful, loving man. Every day I think of my ex-husband and wonder if he thinks of me – or is time for me to try and forget him? It’s been six years now.

Tracey, via email. Tracey, your ex-husband will always be dear to you because you shared so much, for so long. If the two of you work on putting your animosity aside and instead appreciate all the good times, you could be friends.

It sounds like you have a great partner now. You left your ex because there was something emotional that you needed. You’ve found someone who can give you what you were missing. Is it the passion you had with your ex that you miss? Does it outweigh feeling loved and secure? Instead of resenting your ex, maybe talk to him and address some unresolved feelings.

QI’ve been married for 10 years and have two young children. My husband has always been controlling, and recently he has hurt me emotionally and financially. I don’t love him, but I don’t want to leave him either. Am I better off without him?

Anonymous, via email. Only you can answer that question. You can stay with your husband and endure the emotional abuse, or seek counselling to help him with his issues and move forward as a couple, or leave and start over.

Controlling husbands don’t just all of the sudden get better and let go of the need to control. The fact that you said that you don’t love this man tells me there is no way you’ll last until death do you part and live your life to its fullest. What is your life and happiness worth to you? Your future hinges on the value you place on your life.

Your kids deserve a life of contentment and love.