DON’T LET MIX-UPS LINGER, OR LEAVE IMPORTANT THINGS UNSAID, SAYS NENE
Q I was putting some files on my boss’ desk the other day when she came up behind me and made me jump. I think she thought I was looking at her computer screen as she gave me a really funny look. She has been a bit off with me since then – I think she imagines I was snooping, which is just not true. Will I look even guiltier if I try to explain? JOSEPHINE, VIA EMAIL.
A The incident has worried you so I think you should mention it to your boss. Nothing deep and meaningful – just a casual remark: “I do hope you didn’t think I was snooping the other day”. Explain why you were standing at her computer. Not sure it is a good idea, but if it puts your mind at ease, fess up – you did nothing wrong.
Q I’ve been married to my husband for 22 years and have mostly been very happy, but lately he seems to be turning into a grumpy old man. He seems to get annoyed with anything and everything from traffic to ads on TV. He’s quite unhappy with his job so maybe that’s rubbing off. Can you suggest any ways I can help him to cheer up as it’s beginning to get me down? ZELDA, VIA EMAIL.
A Depending on your circumstances, is it possible your husband could resign from his job? It’s obvious he is not happy at work and it’s affecting his whole life. The root of his behaviour is his workplace. You need to have a heart-to-heart. Tell him he has become a grumpy old man and he needs to be honest about what is making him unhappy. There’s more to his demeanour than traffic and ads on TV. Would he consider joining a bowls club or playing golf? He needs a dose of fresh air and exercise.
Q I’ve recently joined a networking group of business people and one of the men there seems to be constantly looking at my chest. I’ve been covering up when I go to the meetings and have avoided wearing low-cut tops, but his eyes always seem to drop to my bust. I’ve asked some of the other women about it and they seem to know what I’m talking about. What should I do? ROCHELLE, VIA EMAIL.
A I’m sooooo glad you have stopped wearing low-cut tops (phew!). I think you should ignore the man and concentrate on why you are at the meeting… to network. Next time you feel he is ogling, turn your back. I could give you other suggestions but they are not printable. Smile and wave him off.