ALLISON DUBOIS
MARRIAGE IS HARD WORK SO DON’T GIVE UP TOO EASILY
QMy hubby and I are separated but he’s here almost half the time. I am torn … I love him but don’t know if it is worth the effort. It seems such hard work most of the time. Am I prolonging the inevitable or can we make something better of this? TT, via email.
ATT, haven’t you heard? Marriage is a lot of hard work. There are a lot of peaks and valleys in marriage. I should know, Joe and I just celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary. It’s getting through the hard times together that makes you feel closer during the good times. If you don’t know if he’s worth the effort, maybe the love you have for him isn’t strong enough. I know that I wouldn’t want to be with someone who didn’t know if I was worth the effort. If your vows were just words, then let him go. He’ll find someone new. But if you’re willing to do the work and love him unconditionally, then move back in together and you both need to make a commitment to give your marriage your all.
There are no iron-clad guarantees but you’d have a good chance of building something real and inspiring. My sense is that you shouldn’t be so easy to give up. Finding someone authentic who truly cares about you and who’s willing to commit their life to you isn’t as easy as people like to believe.
QMy mother passed away unexpectedly six years ago. My brother had been caring for her and I hadn’t seen her for a while as I had a difficult relationship with my brother. Is she at peace? Will she forgive me?
Claudine, via email.
AClaudine, people on the other side are more evolved than we are. They don’t get bogged down in petty things. You and your brother’s issues are living people’s baggage. Your issue is with the choices you made not seeing your mother. You have to forgive yourself for that, your mum doesn’t give it a second thought now. Your mother would say, there’s nothing to forgive! Hold on to your memories of all the other years that you did spend time together, that’s the glue that binds your hearts together. Your mum wants you to find inner peace and happiness.
QMy husband passed away over three years ago. I miss him very much. Does he have a sign that he is around me? I talk to him often.
Elsie, via email.
AElsie, the more that you talk to your husband about the happy memories you shared, the thinner the veil becomes between the two of you. When people say things to deceased loved ones like: “Why did you leave me? Why am I still here?”, such sad statements make it even harder for them to come through to you.
Remember to keep your talks positive. Happy memories lighten our energy so it’s more similar to that of the spirits who want to communicate with us. The energy shift makes it possible for them to reach us through signs, dreams and thoughts.