ALLISON DUBOIS
LIVE FOR THE MOMENT – AND FOR YOUR LOVED ONES IN SPIRIT NEW DESTINY
QAn old friend has come back into my life as a lover. We both have life’s baggage. Is there a future with him? Or am I destined for another? Thank you for your time.
Catherine, via email.
ACatherine, that’s up to you, do you want him? Everyone has baggage, even if it’s emotional baggage from childhood, so don’t let that stop you. How exciting for you, enjoy your playmate don’t worry about where it’s going. People get so caught up in checking all of life’s boxes that they miss the magic of the moment. You’re having a love affair, something that most people crave. Plan fun weekend trips together, get dressed up for him and have a romantic dinner. Get caught up in the moment!
QMy sister lost one of her sons in July in a car crash. Were his grandads there to meet him? Is there anything he can tell us? It hurts so much. His mum needs closure and so do the rest of his family. We all miss him and feel empty inside without our cheeky nephew. Did he hear me asking why? There are so many unanswered questions and I feel so lost and helpless.
Jane, via email.
AJane, I’m so sorry for your family’s great loss. When a child dies, there’s no real ‘closure’ for the parents. Children are physically and spiritually part of us, so they take part of our hearts with them. He can hear you asking why, but there’s no answer that will make you okay with his death.
The only way your sister can be brought back to the living is for her to start to make new memories, knowing her son lives vicariously through her. When she feels pain, he feels it too. Life can be very unfair; it’s most unfair when one of our brightest souls is called home.
Your nephew will have to work through other people to get messages to his mum since she’s blocked by pain. It’s going to take time for healing to begin.
Just listen to her and hold her hand. I suggest a grief support group – grieving people need to be with others who understand their pain. I also recommend my book, Into the Dark, which will help her navigate back to the living.
QI lost my husband seven years ago. I feel alone and lost. I don’t know where I am. Have you got a message for me? I just can’t go on alone. Please help me.
AMarina, via email.
Marina, use your friends and family to ground you. If you don’t have any, go make some new friends. There are plenty of people out there who feel exactly the way you do and with the internet they’re not hard to find. It sounds like you could use counselling, so please consider reaching out for help. People study for many years to help people in your shoes.
When I read people, their deceased loved ones talk about wanting us to do all the things they didn’t get to – they want to see us LIVE. Your husband isn’t gone, however he might be a little frustrated not being able to get through to you all these years. But you must know deep down he’s right beside you. HAVE A QUESTION FOR ALLISON? Email destiny@newidea.com.au