SOCIAL COMMENTATOR & STAR OF NEW IDEA ROYALS PODCAST SURVIVING SELLING YOUR HOME

The tears came when I least expected.

After weeks of our home being on the market and frantically sprucing it up for inspections, it had finally sold and we were moving. All day I packed boxes, moved pot plants, instructed the removalists and wiped kitchen shelves.

Finally, at midnight I returned to the empty house that had been our home for 17 years.

As I moved through the rooms where my babies had come home to and memories had been made, I was suddenly overcome by sobs. For the first time in months, it wasn’t about money or styling or the agent’s feedback or settlement terms. This was the place where we’d become a family, and saying goodbye was wrenching.

Looking back, I realised I hadn’t prepared as well as I could. Selling your home means shifting your perspective from being a ‘homeowner’ to a ‘home seller’ and what I needed was to take a few moments through the process to focus on what lay ahead.

Ironically, I’d done what the experts warn against and had bought before I sold – stressful to say the least! – but I knew the dilapidated fibro cottage I’d bought to demolish would be the setting for the next stage of our lives.

Looking back, I could have done the emotional work beforehand. I should have written a list on my phone of all the reasons why I needed to sell so I could refer to it regularly. That needed to include the downsides of our old home such as the constant sweeping of leaves and the bathrooms badly in need of renovation.

Likewise, I should’ve had an image of my dream home to gaze at regularly so I could shift my focus forward not back. Plenty of times I’d told my children that it’s people who make a home, not the bricks and mortar, but I needed to believe it myself. As I’d said to them: “Life is full of change so being comfortable with it is really important.”

While I really struggled that night last May, a friend’s wise words got me through. My dearest friend lives in England so phoning at midnight was the middle of her day. “I understand, it’s hard,” she said. “But how about you walk into every room and thank it and remember something special that happened there.”

It’s exactly what I did. And, much to my delight, I’ve never looked back.