IT’S TIME THOSE SAS RECRUITS TOUGHEN UP!

They say, “When the going gets tough, the tough get going” ... but gee whiz, on Channel 7’s SAS Australia, the ‘going’ for some celebrity recruits means running out the door and onto a plane ASAP!

Excuse me, what? Did you think it was gonna be pillow fights and a bit of teasing? This show is mean, Mean, MEAN!

I’m the first to admit that taking part in SAS looks more terrifying than a real-life Fight Club. And while Jett Kenny is almost as cute as Brad Pitt, there ain’t nothing pretty about wimping out or putting your tail between your legs and crawling off into the sunset, right?

OK – no-one was exactly surprised when socialite Brynne Edelsten cracked like a fortune cookie on Episode 1. But I figured if she survived five years of marriage to Geoffrey Edelsten (God rest his soul), she could tolerate khaki pants and no makeup for a few days. But Manu Feildel? Come on! The TV chef trained harder than a Nutribullet at warp speed to shed the lard and put on muscle, only to fall flatter than a soufflé once the smell of danger got too close.

They also say, “Misery loves company.” Now, Brynne and Manu are lumped into the same category as Season 1 walkouts, Roxy Jacenko and Schapelle Corby – quitters who really didn’t give it a go.

Tennis champ Alicia Molik also threw in the towel, but who could blame her? Instead of a backhand, she took a couple of right hooks to the face from Olympian, Jana Pittman!

As someone who’s been electrocuted, dangled over cliffs, covered in scorpions and nearly drowned in a glass cage on TV, I totally get the temptation to scream: “I’m a celebrity, get me out of here!”

But this is Australia, mate. Go hard or go home! Oh, that’s right – you DID go home. Never mind!